Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In recent years food and beverages items consist of large amount of sugar that leds to health problems like hearth and fat problems. Other individuals argues that sugar products must be made more costly so people less use them. I fully agree with this opinion beacuse higher prices stop people buying unhealthy food and extra money can be used to help public.
First of all, rise the prices of sugary products is great way to reduce how much people buy. Most shoppers, especially teengares and low income families, look at the price of product before buying anthing. If a bottle of soda or a chocolate drink become too much expensive, so medium or low income individuals stop buying these kinds of product. Futhermore, they start buying fruits and cheaper product which they afford. For instance, in Brazil government imposes a tax on buying sugary products, so residents of brazil start buying sweet drink and sales automatically rose. this shows thta higher prices changes how people shop.
On the other hand, money collected from sugar taxes should be contributed to education sectors. Where children learn about healthy eating and government also spend money in hospitals to encourage people to stop using sugary products because it causes hearth attack and other problems. For example, if healthy food cost less and unhealthy food cost higher then people start consuming health products like fruits and vegatables.
In conclusion, I agree with this perspective that government should introduced taxes on sugar product so that individuals less use these product. Consume healthy products to maintain their physicaly fit.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. The ideas are relevant, such as the impact of price on consumer behavior and the potential use of tax revenue for education. However, the development is somewhat inconsistent. For instance, the example regarding Brazil is contradictory, as the student claims sales 'automatically rose' after a tax was imposed, which undermines the argument that taxes reduce consumption. Additionally, some points are repetitive, and the conclusion is slightly underdeveloped. To reach a higher band, ensure that examples logically support your argument and provide more depth to the explanation of how these policies would function in practice.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. There is a basic attempt to use cohesive devices like 'First of all', 'Furthermore', and 'On the other hand'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as the transition in the second paragraph. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the overall progression of ideas could be more sophisticated to move beyond a simple list of points. Improving the variety and precision of linking words will help enhance the logical flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'hearth and fat problems' (likely meaning heart disease and obesity) and 'teengares'. The student relies on basic vocabulary and struggles with collocations, such as 'use them' instead of 'consume them' or 'make more costly' instead of 'increase the price'. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of flexibility and the presence of spelling errors (e.g., 'thta', 'vegatables') limit the score. Expanding your repertoire of topic-specific vocabulary would be beneficial.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Other individuals argues'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'rise the prices'), and missing articles or prepositions. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like pluralization and verb tense consistency. Increasing the use of error-free complex sentences will also help improve the overall grammatical score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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