Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In many countries, many produced food and drinks consume high percentage of sugar, which can have negative effect on people's health problem. Some people think that these products should be made more expensive to redice sugar consumption. I agree with this idea, although i think it should be combined with other measures.

Initially, increasing the price of sugary products could encourage people to make healthier lchoice. When unhealthy food becomes more expensive, consumers may think twice before purchasing it, especially if there are cheaper and healthier alterntives available. For example, if soft drinks and sweets cost significantly more than water, fresh fruit or homemade snacks, people may gradually change their eating habits. This could help reduce problems such as obesity, diabetes and tooth decay.

Another, crucial benefit is that a tax on surgary products could generate money for governments. This money could be spent on public health campaigns, schools nutrition programme and sports facilities. Such programmes could educate people, about the importance of a balanced diet and regular exercise. As a result, the policy could have a wider impact than simply reducing sugar consumption.

However, making sugary products more expensive may effect low-income families more than wealthy people. Some people may also continue buying these products despite higher prices. Therefore, governments should not depend only on taxation. Clear food labels, public education and restriction and advertising unhealthy products to children should also be introduced.

In conclusion, I agree that sugary food and drinks should be made more expensive because this can discourage excessive consumption and improve public health. However, it would be most effective when combined with education and other health-related policies.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, clearly stating a position in the introduction and maintaining it throughout. The ideas are relevant and well-supported, particularly the discussion on government revenue and the potential for public health campaigns. The argument is extended by acknowledging the potential negative impact on low-income families and suggesting supplementary measures, which demonstrates a balanced approach. The response is well-developed and meets the requirements of the task effectively, showing a clear progression of ideas from the economic argument to the social implications.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central theme, such as the economic impact on consumers or the potential for government funding. Cohesive devices are used effectively, such as 'Initially', 'Another, crucial benefit', and 'Therefore', which help guide the reader through the argument. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. While the flow is generally smooth, the transition between the second and third paragraphs could be slightly more sophisticated to enhance the overall cohesion of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The range of vocabulary is sufficient for the task. You use relevant terms such as 'excessive consumption', 'public health campaigns', and 'balanced diet'. There are some minor errors, such as 'lchoice' (typo) and 'surgary' (spelling), and some slightly awkward phrasing like 'consume high percentage of sugar' instead of 'contain high levels of sugar'. However, these errors do not impede communication. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise collocations and less common academic vocabulary, such as 'fiscal policy' or 'socio-economic implications'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. You successfully use conditional sentences ('if soft drinks... cost significantly more') and relative clauses. There are some grammatical slips, such as 'many produced food and drinks consume' (should be 'contain') and 'effect' instead of 'affect'. Punctuation is generally accurate, though there is an unnecessary comma in 'educate people, about'. Despite these occasional errors, the meaning is always clear, and the control of grammar is generally good, supporting the overall clarity of your argument.

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