Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The modern lifestyle have changed the dietary habits of people. They eat more beverages and sugary food then ever before which are rich in sugars and are subjected to criticism by health professionals due to multiple health hazards. Some people think this trend can be effectively discouraged by making them expensive while other argue against it. I largely agree to the suggestion as these beverages are the cause of multiple health issues.

Sugar is called the white poison by many doctors. They are rich in glucose with very high glycemic index. There is increasing trend in parties and everyday life of eating bakery items like donut , cakes and drinks which are full of glucose and fructose. These forms of carbohydrates raise the blood sugar levels within few minutes as they lack in fibers. This exposes people at risk of developing diabetes , heart diseases and blood pressure. Many individuals eat these items due to easy availability and low cost. Government should increase the price of these products to discourage their purchase and consumption.

On the contrary, some people argue price of these items should not be raised out of reach of poor people. Many students and workers who are living away of their homes eat these food will suffer. Authorities should raise the awareness about healthy eating habits instead. Furthermore, many people are connected to the businesses of these type of food will suffer losses.

In conclusion, I think industry of sugar is deeply rooted the dietary habits of modern society. Active measure should be taken to avoid their consumption. Increasing the price of sugary items could be proved an effective method to cut them from people's diet.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses the prompt by presenting a clear position in favor of increasing prices for sugary products. The main ideas—health risks and the economic impact—are relevant. However, the development is somewhat uneven. While you mention health hazards like diabetes and heart disease, the counter-argument regarding the impact on low-income individuals is brief and could be more thoroughly explored to demonstrate a more nuanced understanding. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is fully extended with specific examples or logical consequences, rather than just stating the point. Overall, the response is relevant and maintains a consistent position throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a distinct focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'On the contrary,' 'Furthermore,' and 'In conclusion' to signal shifts in the argument. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel abrupt. For instance, the jump from the definition of sugar to the impact on health could be smoother. Additionally, referencing is sometimes slightly unclear, such as the use of 'They' in the second paragraph, which could refer to either 'doctors' or 'sugary products.' Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring clear pronoun reference would enhance the overall cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'glycemic index,' 'carbohydrates,' and 'dietary habits.' However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. For example, 'eat more beverages' is unnatural; 'consume more beverages' would be better. Similarly, 'industry of sugar is deeply rooted the dietary habits' is grammatically awkward and lacks the correct preposition. While you attempt to use more sophisticated vocabulary, these minor errors and occasional repetitive phrasing limit the score. Focusing on more precise collocations and avoiding basic errors will help you achieve a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues like 'The modern lifestyle have changed' (should be 'has changed') and 'some people are connected to the businesses... will suffer' (should be 'who are connected... will suffer'). There are also missing articles and prepositions, such as 'living away of their homes' (should be 'living away from home'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. You should focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and preposition usage.

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