Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

These topic will few manufactured food and drink produce contain high levels sugar add many health issue sugar products should be made more expansive to people to consume less effect on human life daily uses so what i will completely agree these statement and discuss both point in upcoming peragraph

To commence with these essay will discuss nawadays different factory and company can produce a many type of drink and food large number every day has process can used hight lavel of sugar to great taste on thing so some time he can used wrong colour manufactured process these will affect on used a human life many type issudes can face every day health damaged a high level used on daily routine for instance they young age children can used these and affect on health issued like gain weight and lose of power and other effect can face it so be clear on making thing low level can used sugar and camical as result he can used not affect and sale very increasing day by day and good result on see up coming years and your compnay groth well a few day

And the other hand many manufactured food drink product contain high level of sugar and other type of laquid used these processing cause will see every day on socity food posion and stamack issue sleeping issue and these kind of other problem can face so government can see these issue and high level action can used wrong thing on process for example a see a news paper list week uk government should action on used wrong thing and high sugar on manufactured drink and food such as a great action on government can control these cause a quickly and fast to right way

In conclusion main effect on a young age people can used it high level product on manufactured on they food and drink daily used encourage them

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by expressing a clear position in favor of increasing taxes on sugary products. However, the development of ideas is limited and often repetitive. While you mention health issues like weight gain and stomach problems, the arguments lack depth and specific supporting evidence. The essay structure is somewhat confusing, as the introduction promises to discuss both points, but the body paragraphs focus primarily on the negative effects of sugar rather than a balanced exploration of the proposed solution. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed idea that directly supports your thesis.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear logical progression. While there are attempts at paragraphing, the transitions between ideas are often abrupt or missing. Cohesive devices are used in a mechanical or incorrect way, such as the repetitive use of 'these' and 'can used'. The introduction is particularly difficult to follow due to run-on sentences and a lack of clear signposting. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'in contrast') and ensure that each sentence flows naturally into the next to guide the reader through your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite limited and often inaccurate, which frequently impedes communication. There is significant repetition of basic words like 'used', 'high level', and 'product'. Many phrases are non-idiomatic or grammatically incorrect, such as 'camical' (chemicals) and 'laquid' (liquid). The word choices are often too informal or imprecise for an academic essay. To reach a higher band, you should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to health and economics, and practice using synonyms to avoid repeating the same words throughout your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that make it difficult to read. There are persistent issues with verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. For example, 'These topic will few manufactured food' is grammatically incoherent. Many sentences are run-on or lack proper punctuation, making it hard to identify where one thought ends and another begins. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, and the errors in basic grammar are frequent enough to cause significant difficulty for the reader. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement is essential.

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