Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The issue of whether the sugar products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar has sparked considerable debate. In my view, there must be a legal action against the excessive use of sugary products, as they can effect our health in multiple ways.

I strongly believe that such products should be made expensive , as there long term use can cause heart problems, diabetes and other anomalies. Too much consumption of sugar can cause inflammation in your body and this will lead to brain fog. We can reduce the quantity of sugar in a product during its manufacturing. Furthermore, every industry must be provided a proper guideline about the quantity of sugar to be used in the following product. Moreover, there must be a punishment over the violation of such roles. For instance, we can increase the price of sugary products to discourage people to buy these items. In Pakistan, the budget committee should pass a bill to increase the price of the sugary products in order to decrease health issues.

On the other hand, their are people who argue that there must not be an increase in the price. These people are addicted to eating sugary items and they are unaware of the consequences that these items can harm us in many ways. There must be proper way to reduce the use of sugar in our daily lives. Although it will lead to a conflict but it is very essential that this point to make a decision of increasing the price.

In conclusion, I know that most of the people have become addicted to sugar and it is used in different sugary products that are easy to offer to our guests. However, its disadvantages outweigh the advantages, so in my opinion there must be a sharp rise in the price of sugary items.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by clearly taking a position that sugary products should be made more expensive and that legal actions are necessary. The writer attempts to support this stance with arguments regarding health issues, such as heart problems, diabetes, and inflammation. However, the development of ideas lacks consistency. For instance, the paragraph shifts abruptly into discussing manufacturing guidelines and governmental punishment, which only loosely ties back to the core question of consumer pricing. While the position is evident throughout, some arguments are repetitive or lack deeper elaboration, falling short of a fully extended and supported discussion. This performance aligns well with the Band 6 descriptor, where all parts are addressed, but some ideas are underdeveloped or lack precise focus.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement and follows a standard four-paragraph essay structure. Ideas generally progress from an introduction to body paragraphs discussing health impacts and pricing solutions, concluding with a summary. However, cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical. The transition phrases such as 'Furthermore', 'Moreover', and 'On the other hand' are occasionally used awkwardly or contradict the flow of logic. For instance, 'On the other hand, their are people who argue...' introduces counterarguments rather clumsily, and referencing pronouns can occasionally be ambiguous (e.g., 'that these items can harm us in many ways'). Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion requires better linking between sentences to achieve a higher band level. This is indicative of Band 6 performance.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms such as 'considerable debate', 'excessive use', 'inflammation', and 'addicted'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and inaccurate word choices throughout the text. For example, 'effect our health' uses the wrong word form instead of 'affect', 'their are people' contains a spelling error for 'there', and 'roles' is used instead of 'rules'. Additionally, phrases like 'this point to make a decision' are unnatural. The writer attempts less common vocabulary but lacks precise control over collocation and spelling, making this a clear fit for Band 5.5, which rounds to Band 6 under standard whole/half band criteria, or strictly Band 5 due to the frequency of basic errors affecting accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like conditional and modal constructions ('we can reduce the quantity', 'every industry must be provided'). However, grammatical errors and punctuation mistakes are frequent throughout the response. Examples include 'whether the sugar products should be made' (unnecessary article), punctuation errors around commas ('made expensive , as'), spelling and homophone errors ('their are people'), and awkward prepositional usage ('punishment over the violation'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur regularly and limit the proportion of error-free sentences. This control over grammar and sentence structure corresponds directly to the Band 5 descriptor.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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