Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-16
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Many manufactured food and drink products include a lot of sugar, which can cause variety of health problems. I strongly agree on sugary food should be more expensive to limit the amount of sugar used by people.
manufacturs make a lot of products that has a lot of sugar. The emplyees who work in the manufacture does not care about the person who eat or drink these products. They care about the taste because they care about getting more money out of the customer. That is why i think people should be more aware about sugary products. Sugary products should not be used a lot by the customer. I believe pricing sugary products with a high price will solve the problem of consuming a lot of sugar from the consumers.
the goverment should prevent people from using more and more sugar, so i believe limiting amount of products will also help not just the price but also the quantity. As a result, by the time consumers will be more aware about the danger of consuming large amount of sugar. Furthermore, government should teach who use sugar to minimize the amount of sugar used by people who use a lot of sugar and replace sugar with vegtables or something healthy and let the consumer to tell the difference by himsel
In conclusion, manufactures do not care about the health issues behind someone who consume sugar, they care about the money that they gain from the customer. To solve this problem, the customer has to be aware or the price of consuming sugar should be more expensive.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by clearly taking a stance in agreement with the proposition that sugary foods should be made more expensive. The writer attempts to develop ideas regarding manufacturer motivations, consumer awareness, and government intervention. However, the development tends to be repetitive, focusing heavily on the claim that manufacturers do not care about health and only care about money, without exploring broader economic or social implications. Furthermore, some arguments become vague, such as the suggestion to replace sugar with 'vegtables or something healthy'. The position is clear throughout, but the depth of support aligns best with Band 5.5, rounded to 5.0 due to repetitive under-developed ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which shows an attempt at overall organisation. However, progression is frequently hindered by repetitive statements and abrupt shifts between ideas, such as moving from pricing strategies to government regulations without smooth transitions. Cohesive devices are basic and sometimes inaccurate, with frequent reliance on simple conjunctions and referencing errors (e.g., 'who use sugar to minimize the amount of sugar used by people'). Paragraphing is initiated, but internal logical flow requires better structuring. This performance corresponds to a Band 5.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is relatively basic and repetitive, with frequent recycling of words such as 'manufactures', 'sugar', 'products', and 'consumer'. There are noticeable spelling errors, such as 'manufacturs' instead of manufacturers, 'emplyees' instead of employees, 'vegtables' instead of vegetables, and 'goverment' instead of government. While the meaning is generally communicated, the limited range and frequent lexical inaccuracies mean the response cannot achieve higher than a Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer demonstrates control over simple sentence structures, but attempts at complex sentences frequently result in grammatical errors. There are numerous punctuation and capitalization errors, such as starting sentences with lowercase letters ('manufacturs', 'the goverment') and missing capitalization on the pronoun 'I'. Errors in subject-verb agreement and preposition usage are common, such as 'sugary food should be more expensive' and 'consume sugar, they care about the money that they gain from the customer'. Because errors are frequent and occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, the grammar aligns with Band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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