Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-16
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which can cause various health problems. Some people believe that sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. I agree with this view because higher prices can reduce excessive consumption and encourage people to choose healthier alternatives.
One of the main reason for making sugary product for expensive of that price can strongly influence people's purchasing decisions. If products like soft drinks, chocolate and sweet became more expensive so people buy it less and the sale of the products were deceased. This can be particularly effects the young people who daily consume the sugary product which is not good for the human life. For example, if a bottle of a sugary drink costs significantly more than water or a sugar-free drink, consumers may prefer the cheaper and healthier option.
Another important reason for consuming a sugary products daily can increase the health issue. Eating and drinking the sugary product can causes the obesity, diabetes, tooth delay and any other issues which is cause by the using of sugary products. For increasing the prices of sugary products so people buy less product and consume less sugar product. In addition, the extra money collected through taxes on sugary products could be used by governments to support public health campaigns and promote healthy lifestyles.
However, the intake of high sugar can causes so much disease like obesity sugar problem and so on health Simply increasing the price may not only the solution, some people continue buy the sugar product and consume it.
In conclusion, I agree that sugary food and drinks should be made more expensive because this could reduce their consumption and encourage healthier choices. Nevertheless, price increases should be combined with public education and other measures to achieve better long-term results.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by clearly stating a position agreeing that sugary products should be made more expensive. All parts of the task are covered, with arguments supporting the view that higher prices reduce consumption and generate tax revenue for public health. However, the development of ideas is sometimes hindered by unclear phrasing, particularly in the body paragraphs where points become repetitive. For instance, sentences like 'For increasing the prices of sugary products so people buy less product and consume less sugar product' lack sufficient extension. The inclusion of a brief counterargument in the fourth paragraph shows an attempt to address alternative viewpoints, though it is slightly disjointed. Overall, the response meets the criteria for Band 6 by addressing all parts with relevant, albeit occasionally repetitive and under-developed, ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction and conclusion, and paragraphs are generally used to separate distinct ideas. However, cohesion is frequently faulty and mechanical. There are noticeable issues with referencing and logical progression between sentences. For example, expressions like 'One of the main reason for making sugary product for expensive of that price' demonstrate awkward transitions and poor logical linking. Paragraphing is attempted, but the fourth paragraph consists of only two sentences that awkwardly overlap with points already raised. While the organisational structure is visible, the execution of cohesive devices is inadequate at times, placing this response firmly in the Band 5 category for cohesion.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, with terms such as 'purchasing decisions', 'public health campaigns', and 'alternative choices'. However, there are persistent errors in word choice, morphology, and collocation throughout the essay. Examples include 'making sugary product for expensive of that price', 'sale of the products were deceased', 'effects the young people', and 'tooth delay' instead of tooth decay. While the writer attempts less common vocabulary, these inaccuracies and awkward phrasings cause noticeable friction for the reader. These recurring lexical errors and limitations in precision align the response with a Band 5 score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting conditional structures ('If products like soft drinks... so people buy it less') and relative clauses. Nevertheless, grammatical accuracy is weak. Frequent errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and prepositional use are present, such as 'One of the main reason', 'sweet became more expensive', and 'high sugar can causes so much disease'. Furthermore, awkward syntactic structures regularly impede smooth reading. Although some simple sentences are error-free, the high frequency of grammatical mistakes in complex structures prevents the essay from reaching Band 6, placing it at Band 5.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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