Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-16
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
As discussed earlier, many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
This clearly shows that how sugar is causing adverse effects on our health and how important it is to limit sugar in our daily life.
From my perspective, it is not a good choice to make sugary products expensive and to think that people will not buy the product because of high cost. For example if there is financially strong person and he is fond of coke or chocolate , which contain a lot of sugar he will definitely buy those products whether how much expensive they cost. Moreover increasing price of sugary products is not a good choice.
Conversely, boycotting those products which contain high sugar or removing them from market is a better choice because when a person doesn’t find that product in market how he would be able to buy that. Whereas children when they see chocolate they will insist on buying them so when the chocolates are not available in the shops they stop demanding them. Sugary products is dangerous for health because it can cause diabetes in children too so it is better to avoid them in a young age.
Overall increasing prices of sugary products will help businesses man to grow their business which is totally wrong, because a financially stable person can easily buy that product which will definitely cause adverse effects on his health and it is also a waste of money.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response presents a clear position regarding whether sugary products should be made more expensive, arguing instead that removing them from the market entirely is a better approach. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. For instance, the writer states that a 'financially strong person' will buy coke or chocolate regardless of cost, but this point is not fully extended or contrasted with lower-income demographics. Additionally, the opening paragraph copies the prompt directly, which does not contribute to the development of the task. While all parts of the prompt are addressed, the arguments remain at a surface level, leading to a Band 5.5 score under the official descriptors.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay displays some overall organization with attempts at logical progression, but cohesion is frequently faulty and mechanical. The writer uses transitional phrases like 'Conversely' and 'Moreover', though 'Conversely' is used inappropriately to introduce a second supporting argument rather than a contrasting idea. Paragraphing is attempted, but the transition between ideas is abrupt, and referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the ambiguous pronoun use in 'so when the chocolates are not available in the shops they stop demanding them'. These issues place the response firmly in the Band 5.0 range for coherence and cohesion.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is generally basic and repetitive, with frequent reliance on simple terms such as 'good choice', 'bad choice', and 'products'. There are noticeable inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'businesses man' instead of 'businessmen' or 'businesses', and 'whether how much expensive they cost' instead of 'no matter how expensive they are'. While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey the basic message and does not severely impede communication, the lack of flexibility and precision limits the score to Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but attempts at complex structures are frequently faulty. Examples of grammatical errors include run-on structures and missing punctuation, such as 'For example if there is financially strong person and he is fond of coke or chocolate , which contain a lot of sugar he will definitely buy those products...' Furthermore, subject-verb agreement and article use are inconsistent, as seen in 'Sugary products is dangerous' and 'in a young age'. These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader, aligning the performance with Band 5.0 descriptors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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