Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this modern era, many individuals like to eat many types of manufactured food and drink items that contain a high level of sugar, which has harmful effects. Some people say that sugar products are made more expensive to encourage individuals to consume less sugar. I strongly agree with this statement, and the views related to this further argument will be discussed in the upcoming paragraph with suitable examples.

To commence with, individual of modren time like to consume manufactured food and drink items that contain high levels of sugar, that kind of edible items make nagitive effect on their physical health. It causes many kinds of diseases in humans, for example, diabetes, fatty liver, and obesity. By consuming these types of items, individuals weaken their immune system, which causes many kinds of harmful diseases in human beings.

Moreover, the government should take steps against it. They make sugar-containing items expensive; by doing this, people avoid them, which helps them to maintain their health. It also saves money on manufactured items; by doing this, people consume fewer sugar-containing items, which make positive effect on their health. For example, fewer sugar-containing items do not have an effect on their body or physical health; for example, high levels of sugar cause us harmful diseases like diabetes, obesity, and fatty liver.

To conclude, people should avoid consuming high levels of sugar-containing food items as well as drinks because it make harmful effect on our health; it also causes many kinds of harmful diseases .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by clearly stating a position agreeing that sugary products should be made more expensive. Relevant ideas are presented, such as the negative physical health impacts of sugar like diabetes, fatty liver, and obesity, as well as the economic incentive for consumers. However, the development is somewhat repetitive, particularly in the third paragraph where the points regarding health effects and avoiding sugary items are reiterated multiple times without adding significant new depth. While the position is clear throughout, the ideas would benefit from greater extension and variety to reach a higher band. Overall, all parts of the task are addressed, earning a Band 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a discernible introduction, body, and conclusion. Paragraphing is attempted, though the division could be managed more effectively to separate distinct points. Cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Moreover', and 'To conclude' are used to signal the progression of ideas, but referencing and linking are sometimes mechanical or repetitive, as seen with the frequent reuse of 'by doing this' and 'for example'. Logical progression is present, but the organizational flow is occasionally hindered by redundancy and abrupt transitions. Consequently, the response fits the criteria for Band 5.5.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms related to health and diet such as 'immune system', 'obesity', 'diabetes', and 'physical health'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations throughout the text, including 'modren time', 'edible items make nagitive effect', and 'sugar-containing items'. Spelling errors like 'modren' and 'nagitive' occur, and the repetition of basic phrasing limits the precision of the argument. Despite these shortcomings, the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the general meaning without severely impeding communication, placing it firmly at a Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as relative clauses ('that contain a high level of sugar, which has harmful effects'). However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('individual of modren time like'), pluralisation ('sugar product', 'disease in human'), and verb tense consistency. Punctuation errors and run-on sentences also occur, such as comma splices linking independent clauses. While the complex structures show an ambition beyond simple sentences, the high frequency of grammatical inaccuracies causes some difficulty for the reader and restricts the score to a Band 5.0.

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