Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Various ready made food and soft drink goods carries elevated blood glucose concentrations which leads to different side effects to our health. I strongly believe that the items having large amount of sugar made enough steep to turn out the individuals to buy products with less sugar. This is possible with the help of high authorites to put some taxes on the goods and set a range of sugar in ingredients.

Intially, Governments should apply high taxes on the sugar contained products. A major contributing factor is that the people who takes excessive amount of sweet in their diet suffers with adverse health diseases like obesity and diabetes.Our body has a appropriate limit to intake the sugar daily however, when we go with high intake. Then we faced these affects. A good example of this is, that there are alot of patients who inherited with diabetes but they are not familiar with this. So when they eat cookies or any sort of other candies etc. They face the deteriorating effects.

In addition to this, High states must put a limit of the sugar in the ready made things by mentioning this on the ingredient section. This is very helpful for the persons who are addicted with the sweet products. Mostly children are very much addictive with the sugar goods. They insist to their parents that they want to eat candies or other items. When the products made with low sugar, these are not much worse for the children. For instance, there are plethora of patients facing diabetes in Pakistan. Means pakistan stands on first having the more patients with this disease. Therefore, Government should give the specific limits to the factories that make ready made goods that you are allow to use only this proportion of sugar.

In Conclusion, after seeing the adverse health effects and having my country on the top list for diabetes patient. I completely agree that the States should take particular steps to deal with this problem.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by clearly taking a stance in agreement with the idea that sugary products should be made more expensive and regulated. The writer presents relevant ideas, such as taxation to reduce consumption and imposing legal limits on sugar content in manufactured goods. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. While examples are provided, such as mentioning the situation in Pakistan, the arguments lack deeper elaboration. The position is maintained throughout, fitting the Band 6 descriptor well.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different arguments (taxation versus government limits on ingredients). However, cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or awkwardly used, such as 'Intially' and 'In addition to this, High states must...'. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as pronoun usage in 'when we go with high intake. Then we faced these affects.' This places the writing firmly in Band 6.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, attempting some less common lexical items such as 'elevated blood glucose concentrations', 'plethora', and 'deteriorating effects'. However, there are numerous inappropriate word choices and collocations, such as 'goods carries elevated', 'high authorites', 'people who takes excessive amount', and 'addictive with the sugar goods'. Spelling and word-form errors like 'Intially' and 'affects' instead of 'effects' also detract from the score, aligning the response with Band 5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but grammatical accuracy is quite low. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Various ready made food and soft drink goods carries', 'the people who takes'), prepositions (e.g., 'suffers with adverse health diseases'), and sentence fragments or run-on structures (e.g., 'Then we faced these affects. A good example of this is, that there are alot of patients...'). These errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, placing the response in Band 5.

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