Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Majority of the sweet products have great level of sugar which may lead to many serious health issues. Some people argue that these products should be costly, in order to prevent others from purchasing it. I strongly oppose this statment because high price of sugary products may cause inflation in the society. In addition, awarness should be given to individuals and natural sugar should be used.

Firstly, higher price of sugar may cause inflation because it did not only affect the sugary product but it also creates a overall impact on other products also and secondly, the people whose jobs are related with it also got effected, which resulted finicial hardships and other economical problems in the society. For instance, due to inflation people may lost their jobs and they have to suffer with harships. Hence, rise in prices of sugary products can effect all other food and drinks also and can leads to economic crisis.

Furthermore, awarness should be given to adults as well as younger through talk shows, campagian and in educational institutes, that how much harmful it is. For example, a team should be created by government that goes to different institutes and give interviews just spread awarness among individuals. Moreover, chemical sugar may cause serious health problems such as diabeties so, it should be replace with the natural one because it is more healthy and less harmful. For example, Before sugar people use sugar cane or honey which is more healthy for them. Hence, through awarness and natural sugar we can get over the chemical one and spent a healthy life.

In conclusion, rising the price of sugary product is not the solution because, it may lead to economic crisi. Awarness among individuails and used of natural sugar are the best replacement.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The student addresses the prompt by clearly taking a stance against making sugary products more expensive and provides alternative solutions, such as raising awareness and replacing chemical sugar with natural options. The position is maintained throughout the essay. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. For instance, the economic argument regarding inflation is introduced but lacks depth or specific examples beyond general assertions about jobs and hardships. Similarly, the awareness argument touches on relevant points but relies on underdeveloped explanations. While all parts of the task are addressed, the ideas would benefit from more thorough elaboration to reach a higher band level, placing this response comfortably at Band 5.5 to 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a logical overall structure with clear paragraphing, dividing the introduction, two body paragraphs focusing on different counter-arguments and alternatives, and a brief conclusion. Cohesive devices are employed, such as 'Firstly,' 'Furthermore,' and 'In conclusion,' though their use can sometimes feel mechanical. Referencing and substitution occasionally lack precision, as seen in vague pronoun usage like 'how much harmful it is' without a clear antecedent. Paragraph progression is generally evident, but the internal logical flow within paragraphs is slightly disjointed due to repetitive phrasing and minor structural awkwardness. This reflects the characteristics of a Band 6 performance.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range for the task, successfully using terms like 'financial hardships,' 'economic crisis,' and 'educational institutes.' However, there are notable spelling and word choice errors throughout the text, such as 'statment' instead of 'statement,' 'awarness' instead of 'awareness,' 'campagian' instead of 'campaign,' 'diabeties' instead of 'diabetes,' and 'rising' instead of 'raising' the price. While these errors do not severely impede overall communication, they demonstrate a lack of control over less common lexical items and accurate spelling, capping the lexical score at Band 5.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, using conditional and subordinate clauses such as 'Some people argue that these products should be costly, in order to prevent others from purchasing it.' However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and prepositions, such as 'it did not only affect' (instead of 'does not only affect'), 'can leads' (instead of 'can lead'), 'Before sugar people use' (instead of 'Before sugar, people used'), and 'used of natural sugar' (instead of 'use of natural sugar'). Although communication is rarely obscured, the accumulation of errors prevents the grammar from achieving a Band 6.

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