Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Many confectionary goods produced by such industries which contain a high amount of sugar. This kind of products consumed by people, they may suffer from many health related issues. I totally agree with company should be made sweet food and drinks more costly to promote every individual to use less sugar. In this essay, I will mention about the reason with relevant examples.

In our daily lives, most of the people use manufactured food and drink products which possess high level of sugar. Majority of confectionary food and drink items containing 40 - 50 % sugar. The constant use of this products can lead many disease. For example, Diabetes, Obesity, etc. This disease can ultimately welcomed other health problems such as heart attack. Medical science has also reported that the joint related problems caused by using cold drinks which reduce the calcium absorption in our bones. So, this can weaken our skeletal system. Instead, company should be made this products more costly. So that people get concerned about to use less sugar. This sugary material can also affected our body to increase the lazziness. As per the standard of FSSAI, manufacturing company should follow the standard and mention sugar level properly.

To conclude that people should have use less sugary food and drink products that reduce the risk of many disease. To concern the health of people, many manufacturing company should maintain the sugar level in their prooducts.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by clearly stating a position that sugary products should be more expensive to reduce consumption. However, the task achievement is negatively impacted by the length requirement not being met, as the essay contains only 238 words, falling short of the 250-word minimum. While the student attempts to present reasons and examples, such as mentioning diabetes, obesity, and calcium absorption, the ideas are often under-developed and lack extension. Furthermore, there are some sweeping generalisations and the argument tends to drift slightly into general health advice rather than strictly maintaining focus on pricing as a deterrent. Because the response is under-length and lacks full development of ideas, it aligns best with Band 5.0.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, though the introductory paragraph is quite brief and the body is compressed. There is an attempt at overall progression, but the logical connection between sentences is frequently disrupted by awkward transitions and poor referencing. For instance, the transition 'Instead, company should be made this products more costly' lacks clear logical continuity with the preceding medical claims. Cohesive devices are used mechanically and sometimes inaccurately, such as 'To conclude that people should have use less sugary food'. Paragraphing is attempted, but the grouping of ideas lacks smooth transitions. These issues in logical progression and cohesive control place the response firmly at Band 5.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary that is minimally adequate for discussing health and food products. There are frequent word-choice and collocation errors, such as 'confectionary goods produced by such industries which contain', 'constant use of this products', and 'increase the lazziness'. The student attempts less common lexical items like 'calcium absorption', 'skeletal system', and 'obesity', but these are accompanied by noticeable inaccuracies and awkward phrasing ('joint related problems', 'prooducts'). Spelling errors also occur ('lazziness'). Because the vocabulary is repetitive and contains errors that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, the response warrants a Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but control over grammar is weak. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including missing verbs, incorrect verb forms, and faulty agreement, as seen in 'Many confectionary goods... which contain a high amount of sugar' (sentence fragment) and 'people should have use less sugary food'. Punctuation and article usage are also erratic. Complex structures are often faulty, and simple sentences frequently contain basic errors. Because the frequency of errors is high and can cause difficulty for the reader, this performance meets the criteria for Band 5.0.

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