Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
MANY MANUFACTURED FOOD AND DRINK ARE CONTAIN HIGH LEVEL OF SUGAR WHICH LEAD TO SEVERAL HEALTH PROBLEMS. SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT THESE PRODUCTS SHOULD BE MADE MORE EXPANSIVE TO ENCOURAGE TO CONSUME LESS SUGAR. I AGREE WITH THIS VIEW A HIGHER PRICES CAN REDUCE THE CONSUMPTION OF UNHEALTHIER PRODUCTS AND ENCOURAGE PEOPLE TO USE HEALTHIER ALTERNATIVES.
FIRST, THE HIGH PRICES OF SUGARY PRODUCTS ARE DISCOURAGE TO PEOPLE USE THEM REGULARLY. WHEN UNHEALTHY FOOD AND DRINK ARE MORE EXPENSIVE PEOPLE THINK MAY CAREFULLY BEFORE PURCHASE THEM. THIS PARTICULARY CAN BE EFFECTIVE FOR THE YOUNG PEOPLE, WHO OFTEN BUY SOFT DRINK, CHOCOLATES AND SWEETS. FOR EXAMPLE: IF THE PRICE OF SUGAR PRODUCTS AND DRINK INCREASE SIGNIFICANTLY, SOME PEOPLE CHOOSE WATER AND FRESH JUICES AS RESULT, THE DAILY INTAKE OF SUGAR CAN DECREASE.
SECONDLY, THE HIGHER PRICES CAN ENCOURAGE PEOPLE TO DEVELOP HEALTHIER EATING HABITS. IF THE HEALTHY GOODS ARE CHEAPER AS COMPARED TO SUGARY CONSUMER, PEOPLE WILLING TO CHOOSE FRESH FRUITS, VEGETABLES AND OTHER NUTRITIOUS DIETS. IN ADDITION GOVERNMENTS CAN CAHRGE TAXES ON SUGAR PRODUCTS AND RISE MONEY SPEND ON COMPAIGN. THESE COMPAIGN CAN EDUCATE PEOPLE TO HARMFULL EFFECTS OF SUGAR CONSUMPTION TOO MUCH AND ENCOURAGE THEM TO BETTER CHOICES.
HOWEVER, SIMPLY INCREASING PRICES CANNOT SLOVE THE PROBLRMS. SOME PEOPLE CAN BUY SUGARY PRODUCTS AT HIGH PRICE DESPITE ESPECIALLY, THEY STRONGLY ATTACHED THEM.
IN CONCLUSION, I AGREE SUGARY PRODUCTS SHOULD MORE EXPENSIVE TO REDUCE THE CONSUMPTION AND ENCOURAGE HEALTHIER CHOICES. HOWEVER, THS CAN MEASURE SUPPORTED BY EDUCATION AND HEALTHIER POLICIES ACHIEVE BETTER RESULTS.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by taking a clear position on whether sugary products should be made more expensive. The writer presents relevant arguments supporting higher prices to reduce consumption and encourage healthier habits, while also briefly considering a counter-argument regarding dedicated consumers. However, some ideas are somewhat underdeveloped or over-generalized, and the phrasing lacks precision in places. For example, the mention that governments can charge taxes and raise money for campaigns is relevant, but the development remains brief. Overall, the response meets the requirements for Band 6 because it addresses all parts of the task with relevant, though partially developed, ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the response into paragraphs, including an introduction, two body paragraphs discussing the main points, a counter-argument paragraph, and a conclusion. Logical sequencing is present, with transitional markers like FIRST, SECONDLY, and HOWEVER. However, cohesion is at times faulty and mechanical. For instance, referencing is occasionally imprecise ('this can measure supported'), and paragraph transitions can feel abrupt. Cohesive devices are used, but with mechanical repetition and some awkward phrasing that disrupts the flow. This fits the Band 6 descriptor well.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'consumption', 'nutritious', and 'significantly'. However, there are frequent word-choice and collocation errors, such as 'EXPANSIVE' instead of 'expensive', 'ARE CONTAIN' instead of 'contain', 'CHAHGE TAXES' instead of 'charge taxes', and 'RISE MONEY' instead of 'raise money'. Spelling and morphological errors ('HARMFULL', 'SLOVE THE PROBLRMS', 'ATTACHED THEM') are noticeable, though they do not seriously impede overall communication. These limitations place the lexical resource squarely at a Band 5.5 to 6.0 level.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as conditional structures ('if the price of sugar products and drink increase significantly...') and relative clauses. However, there is a high frequency of grammatical errors throughout the text, including missing auxiliary verbs ('are contain', 'are discourage to people use'), incorrect prepositions, tense inconsistencies, and word form errors. While the meaning is generally retrievable despite these persistent errors, the lack of error-free complex sentences prevents the score from reaching Band 6. The grammatical control aligns with a Band 5.
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