Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, sugar is excessively used in all routine products, which caused many health issues. Therefore, it is suggested that to overcome this problem the goods which includes sugar in it must be more and more expensive so the individuals can overcome it's consumption. In this essay, I will not only discuss the reasons why I strongly disagree with the statement but also propose several alternative solutions.

Firstly, the sugar is mostly used in products like sweets which are mostly used on special occasions such as cultural or religious festivals, so if the government make sugar expensive it will disturb these special events of the financially unstable families. Additionallay, the excessiveness of everything is dangerous for human health so the necessity is to consume sugar by staying in your limit not to make it expensive so the people are not able to buy it.

Secondly, it is right that sugar causes health problems like heart disease and insulin issues but there are many other methods which will be more useful than adding extra tax on it. Moreover, the government should conduct seminars in which they can invite nutritionist who tell people how to schedule their diet to stay fit. Furthermore, the food authorities can set the limit of sugar which can be added in food and drink products, and completely ban those who violet the rule.

In conclusion, from my perspective if the sugar products become expensive it doesn't mean that the people who were addicted to it will not buy them, infact the most appealing solution is to start compgains to tell the people how to use it in their best manners.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by presenting a clear position (disagreeing with the proposal to make sugary products more expensive) and supporting it with reasons and alternative solutions. The student introduces arguments regarding financially unstable families and cultural events, and suggests alternatives such as seminars and limiting sugar content. While the ideas are relevant, some parts of the development are a bit repetitive or general, corresponding well to a Band 6.5 or Band 7 descriptor. The position is maintained consistently throughout the essay, and the alternatives are appropriately tied to the broader issue of public health.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay is organised into four paragraphs with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are employed to signal transitions, such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'In conclusion'. However, referencing and cohesion are occasionally faulty or mechanical, as seen in phrases like 'the excessiveness of everything is dangerous' and some repetitive sentence openings. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, but the logical progression within paragraphs sometimes lacks seamless transitions, placing the response firmly at a Band 6.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'financially unstable', 'excessiveness', and 'nutritionist'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as 'routine products' instead of everyday products, 'it's consumption' instead of 'its consumption', 'additionallay' (spelling), and 'compgains' (campaigns). These errors do not impede communication, but they restrict the lexical score to a Band 6.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and conditional structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors in tense consistency, prepositions, and word forms, such as 'which caused many health issues' (should be 'cause' or 'have caused'), 'if the government make sugar expensive' (should be 'makes'), and 'the sugar is mostly used' (unnecessary article). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but grammatical inaccuracies occur regularly, which places this criterion at a Band 5.5.

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