Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The use of ready made food and drinks has become increasingly common in recent years. These products contain high levels of sugars that are associated with numerous health risks. Some people argue that increasing the retail of these products can only cease the consumers from buying these products. I completely disagree with this view as making products more expensive will only benefit the manufacturers, people will still buy the products. A strict action against brands can be helpful in addressing this issue.
One major reason i disagree with this view is that when prople get addicted to some products, it becomes challenging to get rid of those addictions. Manufacturing companies add high level of sugars on purpose to enhace the flavour of the products and make people addicted to it. For instance, there are a number of juice brands that add high amount of sugars.They do this to make product delectable like juices and jellies for children to consume, children start consuming them more often. If the price of product gets increased, children will still buy those products as they like the taste of the product. So increasing price would not decrease the sale of the product.
Another reason is that increasing price will only contribute to the finacial growth of the manufacturers. As once people like the flavour of the product, they prefer to buy the same product no matter how much it costs them. So increasing rates will only be favourable for the brands. Strict actions against the brand owners who add sugars above the limit can facilitate in addressing this issue. If the high sugar products are banned in market, only then people won't buy those products.
In conclusion, increasing prices will only be benifucial for the products owner. Increasing the retail will effect the pockets of the buyers only . The most effective way is to ban the products with high sugar content and fine the manufacturers.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by presenting a clear position throughout: you completely disagree with the idea of raising prices and instead suggest strict actions against brands, such as bans or fines. However, the ideas are somewhat limited and under-developed. For instance, while you mention that addiction makes price increases ineffective, the explanation remains repetitive and relies heavily on assertions about children and juice brands rather than broader economic or public health arguments. To move to a higher band, you would need to extend and support your arguments with deeper elaboration, exploring the nuances of consumer behavior or alternative policy measures more fully.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear stance stated in the introduction, followed by body paragraphs that examine the ineffectiveness of price hikes and propose alternative solutions. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate distinct points. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty, such as the repetitive use of transitional phrases like "Another reason is" and some unclear referencing (e.g., "prople" and pronoun referencing issues). Progression is present, but it lacks the smooth flexibility found at higher bands. To improve, you should employ a wider and more natural variety of cohesive devices and ensure that referencing between sentences is consistently clear.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to communicate your opinion on the topic, featuring attempts at less common items such as "addiction", "delectable", and "financial growth". However, there are noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling that occasionally cause difficulty, such as "ready made" instead of ready-made, "finacial" instead of financial, "benifucial" instead of beneficial, and "products owner" instead of product owners. Additionally, phrases like "increasing the retail" are used inaccurately for "increasing retail prices". To achieve a higher score, you need to expand your lexical range, improve spelling accuracy, and use less common collocations with greater precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as conditional sentences ("If the high sugar products are banned...") and subordinate clauses. However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, including missing articles ("add high amount of sugars"), pluralisation errors ("price of product gets increased"), subject-verb agreement issues, and missing capitalization or punctuation control. While these errors rarely impede overall communication, they occur regularly enough to restrict the response. To progress, you should aim for a higher proportion of error-free complex sentences and exercise tighter control over articles, plurals, and basic grammatical patterns.
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