Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Factory made food and drink are very popular in all over the world and the things that obtained from factory cause many serious health problems due to excess of sugar and to control the diseases come from sugar it is essential to made sugary products more costly to prevent people from using excess amount of sugar. I have mixed opinion about the statement that i will discuss in paragraphs below.

On the one hand, i think the cost of sugary products should be high due to following reasons. Firstly, some people are very used to of drinking cold drinks that wherever they went they brought soft drinks without any reason so, to prevent these habits i think the soft drinks must be expensive. Secondly, when we went to someone house he gave manufactured products instead of making health product at home because these are very cheaper than manufactured products one of my personal example, one days i went to my friend's home he served me with manufactured products like cake and when i took first bite it was very sugary and he told me that cake price is very value for money that's why if prices are high we need to think before buying them.

On the the other hand, there are also several reasons to maintain the manufactured products prices low. At first, the main reason is to maintain prices low that every middle class person can afford the factory products because it is unfair that rich people are able to eat tasty products while other cannot afford them. Another reason, keeping manufactured products prices low are beneficial for companies sale also.

To conclude, i want to say that we should not use manufactured products as a habit.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the task partially, attempting to present a balanced view on whether sugary products should be more expensive. A position is stated in the introduction with the phrase "I have mixed opinion," though the development of ideas remains limited and under-developed. For instance, the arguments regarding habit and affordability are supported primarily by personal anecdotes, such as "one days i went to my friend's home," rather than well-extended, broader societal arguments. Furthermore, some parts of the prompt, particularly the explicit link between price increases and reduced sugar consumption, are only superficially explored. To reach a higher standard, the writer needs to ensure all ideas are thoroughly extended with robust explanations and clear examples that directly evaluate the prompt's core premise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays some overall organization with recognizable paragraph breaks, including an introduction, body paragraphs addressing both sides, and a brief conclusion. However, there is a lack of clear overall progression, and the logical flow is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing and repetitive transitions like "At first" and "Another reason." Cohesive devices are sometimes inaccurate or mechanical, and referencing is not always clear, as seen in phrases like "the things that obtained from factory" or "the same price is very value for money." Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion within paragraphs requires tighter logical links. To improve, the writer should use a wider variety of cohesive devices naturally and ensure that sentences build upon each other in a smooth, logical sequence without relying on overly simplistic connectors.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to convey basic ideas about food and prices. The writer relies heavily on simple, repetitive terms such as "manufactured products," "prices," and "sugary products." There are noticeable lexical errors and inappropriate word choices throughout the text, including phrases like "health product at home" instead of homemade healthy food, and "companies sale" instead of company sales. Word forms and collocations are frequently flawed, such as "very cheaper" instead of much cheaper, and spelling errors occasionally occur, though meaning is generally retrievable. To achieve a higher band, the writer must expand their lexical range by incorporating less common vocabulary, precise academic collocations, and demonstrating better control over word formation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a very limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on run-on sentences and coordination. Attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty, leading to structural breakdowns, such as in the opening sentence which spans several clauses without proper punctuation. Frequent errors occur in articles, prepositions, subject-verb agreement, and verb forms, including "is essential to made," "wherever they went they brought," and "the things that obtained." Punctuation is also weak, with commas incorrectly used to splice independent clauses. These frequent errors cause occasional difficulty for the reader and impede comprehension. To improve, the writer needs to practice forming accurate simple and complex sentences, paying careful attention to verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and structural completeness.

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