Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Numerous manufactured food and drink products contain excessive amounts of sugar, which leads to many health issues. Sugar items should be made costly to encourage people to intake less sugar. I partially agree with this statement.

Discussing the points of agreement, the first reason is that many products which have high amounts of sugar are consumed by children and older people. Explaining further, as there are many industries which make sugary products such as chocolates, ice-creams, and cold-drinks. All items are consumed by children and older people . If they intake more sugar then it will directly affect their health and they would suffer from diseases. The second reason is that sugary products are easily available in the market as it demands increase so companies reduce it costs. After that, people often buy without any concerns about health problems. The government should organise campaigns and awareness programs for people who take more sugar.

Discussing the points of disagreement, the first reason is that the person who has a problem by taking more sugar should avoid consuming sugar products. Why does everyone have to pay more? Explaining further, not everyone is concerned about their health. If the charges of the products increase then people who love to eat food and drinks which are sugary for them would not be beneficial.

To conclude, excessive sugary products are often taken by children and older people. The government should conduct awareness programs. While, people who do not have any problem by consuming more sugar products for their amount remain the same.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both sides of the issue and presenting a clear, albeit limited, position of partial agreement. However, the development of ideas remains restricted and under-developed. For instance, the points regarding vulnerable groups like children and older people, and the economic aspects of pricing, are introduced but lack deep extension or fully supported examples from your own knowledge. The explanation of why products become cheaper as demand increases is somewhat repetitive and vague. To reach a higher band, you would need to extend your arguments more fully, providing deeper explanations and more specific, well-reasoned examples for both your points of agreement and disagreement throughout the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

There is a basic logical organisation to the essay, dividing the text into clear introduction, body, and conclusion paragraphs. However, overall progression is limited, and transitions between sentences can feel mechanical or abrupt. Cohesive devices are used repetitively, such as starting multiple sentences with phrases like 'The first reason is that' or 'Explaining further'. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, as seen in phrases like 'for their amount remain the same' in the conclusion. To improve cohesion, you should integrate a wider variety of transitional markers more naturally, ensure that referencing is precise, and create smoother conceptual links between your supporting arguments and main ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is minimally adequate for the task, demonstrating an attempt to discuss health and economic impacts using words like 'manufactured', 'excessive', and 'awareness programs'. Nevertheless, the range of vocabulary is limited, and there are noticeable errors in word choice, collocation, and phrasing. Examples include 'Sugar items' instead of 'Sugary products', 'intake less sugar' instead of 'consume less sugar', and 'reduce it costs' instead of 'reduce their costs'. These lexical slips and repetitive use of basic terms mean the vocabulary cannot support a higher band. To advance, you should incorporate a broader range of less common lexical items, pay closer attention to natural collocations, and ensure greater precision in word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay displays a limited range of grammatical structures, relying primarily on simple sentences alongside a few basic complex forms. When you attempt more complex structures, errors frequently occur, such as in the clause 'the person who has a problem by taking more sugar should avoid consuming sugar products', where preposition choice and phrasing are awkward. There are also recurrent errors in subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as 'as it demands increase' instead of 'as demand increases'. While these errors do not completely obscure your overall meaning, their frequency causes some difficulty for the reader. Incorporating a wider variety of error-free complex sentences will be essential for improving this criterion.

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