Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Sugar has become a key ingredient in mordern-day processed foods.

The widespread consumption of processed food which contains higher amount of sugar has grown health concerns in present-day life. It is believed that high-pricing sugary products would lead individuals to consuming less sugar. I strongly believe with the latter statement as it would generate awarness regarding health problem and also provide a good alternative to sugar.

To begin with major underlying health problems originates from excessive consumption of sugary diet yet people devour it. This is due to the insufficient knowledge about the link between health conerns and sugar diets . An increase in price range of sugar products will generate conscience making one question their purchases and limit towards the purchase of such prodcuts. It will also encourage people to investing the cause of sice rise in prices and ultimately lead to discovering health problems which sugar may cause. For a example, Recently caramlized sugar candies became more expensive than usual this lead to an the discovery of its sugar content and that it caused reoccuring cough.

Futhermore, Increased price in sugar products will led people uncovering its new and better alternative. There are substantially better ingredients than sugar itself that is being used for adding sweetness. They are all overpowered by the wide range of artifical sugar which is readily available due to its affordability. To cite a example, It was discovered that sugar can be a harmful product to diabetic patients which made people rediscover the uses of stivia and jaggary which are natural sweetners and do not cause any adverse effects.

In conclusion, It is debatable whether expensive sugar peoduces will constain consumer from buying it. I strongly believe that it will make individuals more aware of the product and might actual allow them finding new and better alternative.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task, presenting a clear position agreeing with the prompt that making sugary products more expensive will encourage people to consume less. Relevant ideas are introduced, such as increased price raising awareness of health problems and prompting the search for alternatives. However, some ideas are under-developed or lack full extension. For instance, the example regarding caramelized sugar candies becoming expensive and leading to the discovery of a recurring cough is rather simplistic and lacks broader elaboration. To move to a higher band, the writer needs to provide more fully developed explanations and more robust, realistic examples to support the main arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear stance stated in the introduction and revisited in the conclusion. Paragraphing is used to separate distinct points, moving logically from health awareness to the discovery of alternatives. However, cohesion at times feels mechanical or faulty. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Futhermore', and 'In conclusion' are employed, but referencing and logical transitions between some sentences within paragraphs are occasionally unclear. For example, the link between price increases and investigating the cause of the price rise is somewhat disjointed. To achieve a higher band, the writer should ensure that cohesive relationships between sentences are smoother and that referencing is more precise throughout.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully communicating the writer's main points. The student attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'widespread consumption', 'underlying health problems', and 'artificial sugar', demonstrating an acceptable range for this level. However, there are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors that occur throughout the text, including 'mordern-day' instead of 'modern-day', 'higher amount' instead of 'higher amounts', 'awarness', 'conerns', 'prodcuts', and 'stivia'. While these do not seriously impede communication, they reflect limitations in lexical precision and control. To reach the next band, the student must broaden their vocabulary range, improve word choice, and eliminate spelling mistakes.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as relative clauses and conditional-like relationships. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, but they rarely impede communication. Examples of grammatical lapses include 'major underlying health problems originates' (subject-verb agreement), 'limit towards the purchase' (preposition error), 'Increased price in sugar products will led people uncovering' (tense and pattern errors), and unnecessary commas before or within clauses. To improve to a higher band, the writer should incorporate a wider variety of error-free complex structures and exercise better control over verb forms, prepositions, and agreement.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.