Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high amount of sugar,which may lead to various health problem.Some people belive that Sugary product should made expensive to reduce the consumption of sugar.I Agree with this statement that sugary product should made expensive.

One of the main reason to increase the price of sugary product is to encourage people to consume less sugary product.Increased sugary product is expensive people will think twice before purchasing.People will less consume sugar their health will also good.The sugary juice which consume a huge amount of sugar their price will also increased and they become expensive.This will increase the supply of healhy product.People should prefer to buy healthy product over sugary product.For instance,by the over use of sugary product,people may face or cause various type of health problem.Government should assist people to use healthy product over unhealthy product.

Another important reason is that higher price incourage people to develop their healthier habtiat.If government charge high tax and make strict rules and regulation that will support people to consume healther product.The incresement in the tax and the rules is strict to use less sugar that m,ay reduce the manufacture.For eg,As we all know japan is highly developed country in that country rules is so strict that company should paste all the incrediants and the product contain high sugar or not,they have to paste in the paper.They cannot play with the life of countrys people.,

Thus,I strongly agree that sugary product should made expensive.Although this cannot solve health,this can reduce the use of unhealthy product,this can encourage people to apply healthy product.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your response addresses the task partially by stating a clear position that sugary products should be made more expensive. However, your ideas are limited and somewhat repetitive, which keeps the development constrained. You touch upon relevant concepts like reducing consumption and encouraging healthier habits, but these points are underdeveloped and lack strong, fully explained supporting examples. For instance, mentioning Japan as an example is a good thought, but the explanation regarding ingredient labels becomes slightly tangential to the core issue of taxation and price increases. To move up to a higher band, you need to extend your main ideas with more precise explanations and well-integrated examples that directly support how price changes influence consumer behavior.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation in your essay, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, but overall it lacks clear progression. The transitions between sentences can feel mechanical or abrupt, and referencing is occasionally unclear, such as when pronouns like 'this' refer back loosely to previous clauses without a sharp connection. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal flow of ideas within paragraphs needs better logical linking. To achieve a higher band, ensure that each sentence builds smoothly on the last, use a wider and more accurate range of cohesive devices, and maintain a clear, logical thread of argument from your introduction through to your final conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Your vocabulary is limited but minimally adequate to convey your basic point of view on the topic. You attempt some less common words and phrases, such as 'consumption', 'manufacture', and 'incrediants', but these are accompanied by noticeable errors in word form, spelling, and word choice. For example, expressions like 'healther habtiat' instead of 'healthier habits' or 'healhy product' demonstrate that your control over collocations and word forms is still developing. To reach the next level, you should expand your vocabulary range, pay closer attention to spelling, and focus on using precise word choices and natural collocations that communicate your ideas without causing confusion for the reader.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You demonstrate a limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and basic combinations. When you attempt complex sentence forms, they are frequently faulty, containing errors in verb forms, tense consistency, and punctuation. Examples include missing articles ('high amount of sugar'), missing copula verbs ('Sugary product should made expensive'), and run-on sentences lacking appropriate punctuation or conjunctions ('Increased sugary product is expensive people will think twice'). These frequent grammatical errors can cause some difficulty for the reader. To progress, you need to practice forming accurate complex sentences with correct subordinate clauses, proper subject-verb agreement, and reliable punctuation.

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