Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

Some manufactured food and drink products contain highest levels of sugar, In these causes many health issues. in constant, Sugary products should be made to much expensive to rncourage persin to consume less sugar.

Overall, There are lot of creating foods and drinks in whole world. However, some sugar products are very good taste for people. Therefore, I do not agree in this statement. There are another reasons asa well as, I explain the statmenr in the upcomimg paragraphs.

To begin with, there are to much sugar cans and some drink popular in my country. However, people likes drink with sugar when takes a drink then feels relax. For instance, they argue that can be addresssed because it depends on the some sweets and sugar drink. On the other hand, many drink should moore expansive perple to buy less suger. Resultantly, when suger products will much expensive as compare to past rates So, indivdual will not purchase suger drink.

Another important point is that, at present, Moslty, prople buuy some sugar drink and sweets easily. furthmore, i am agree sugar products should be more expansive in future.For Example, in future mostly sugar iteams should be not expensive on the other side, this is very greatdul as well as, very beneficial in my country. In result, people will be happy and feels good oue country.

In conclusion, suger products not expensive in future Furthmore, people will but easily and reasonable price, that is very good thing for country.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response only partially addresses the task. First, it must be noted that the length requirement of 250 words is not met, as the student's response contains 247 words. Furthermore, the writer's position is confused and contradictory. In the introduction, the student states, 'I do not agree in this statement,' but later in the body paragraphs, statements such as 'i am agree sugar products should be more expansive in future' create a contradictory and unclear stance on whether sugary products should cost more. Ideas are extremely limited, repetitive, and under-developed, relying on vague assertions rather than supported arguments or relevant examples. To improve, the writer must ensure the word count requirement is met, establish a clear and consistent position from the beginning, and fully develop relevant supporting ideas with clear explanations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

The response displays some organization into paragraphs, but there is no clear overall progression of ideas. While the student attempts to use transition markers such as 'To begin with', 'Another important point is that', and 'In conclusion', these cohesive devices are often misused or mechanically applied, failing to create logical links between sentences. For instance, the transition 'On the other hand' appears abruptly without contrasting a preceding coherent point. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal structuring of paragraphs lacks logical flow, and referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult to follow the writer's line of thought. To move to a higher band, the writer needs to ensure that ideas follow a logical sequence and that cohesive devices are used accurately to show clear relationships between sentences and paragraphs.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, reflecting a limited range that is only minimally adequate for the task. The student frequently misuses words and collocations, such as 'highest levels of sugar', 'creating foods', and 'greatdul', along with numerous spelling errors like 'rncourage', 'persin', 'moore expansive', and 'iteams'. These lexical errors and awkward word choices often cause difficulty for the reader and strain comprehension. To improve, the student should expand their working vocabulary beyond basic terms, pay closer attention to word formation and spelling, and learn standard collocations related to health and lifestyle topics rather than relying on incorrect phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response demonstrates a very limited range of sentence structures. Most attempts at complex sentences are faulty, and the text is heavily marred by frequent grammatical errors, including issues with verb forms, subject-verb agreement, missing articles, and incorrect prepositions. Examples include 'In these causes many health issues', 'Sugary products should be made to much expensive', and 'people likes drink with sugar when takes a drink then feels relax'. These errors are frequent and often obscure the intended meaning, causing significant difficulty for the reader. To achieve a higher score, the writer must focus on basic sentence construction accuracy, ensuring correct verb tenses, proper subject-verb agreement, and reducing the density of fundamental grammatical errors.

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