Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Numerous processed food and drink items contain high sugar levels, which results in health issues. Hence, sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to eat sugar in less quantity. I agree with this view because increasing the price of sugary products will reduce the sales which inturn will reduce its production.
Increasing the price of sugary products will make them inaccessible for a lot people with low wages and rich people might also show reluctance in buying expensive sugary products. Hence, this will reduce the consumption of sugar among the public. Furthermore, it will encourage people to find healthier alternatives of these products that are not as harmful. A glass of Coca Cola contains about 7 to 8 spoons of sugar. This excessive intake of sugar can lead to health problems, such as diabetes. Thus, making it expensive will encourage people to switch to fresh lime or healthier drinks.
Increasing the cost of sugary prodcuts will adversely effect the sale of these products as people won't be purchasing them so often or at all. As a result, the production of such products would also decrease. They would no longer be on the front aisles in the grocery stores and super markets. Therefore, raising the price will reduce the production of such products and will encourage the public to shift towards a healthier lifestyle. For example, if the price of a fizzy drink bottle is increased, people won't be consuming it that often or at all. Hence, the profit that these companies were making will reduce. This will in the longer run decrease the production of such goods.
In conclusion, the consumption of sugary food and drink products is harmful to health. Hence making such products more expensive will encourage people to consume less as people will show reluctance in buying them which will inturn reduce the production of such goods.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
Your position is clear from the introduction: you agree that higher prices can reduce consumption and production. The response addresses the main question and gives relevant support, including the Coca-Cola example and the suggestion that people may choose healthier drinks. However, some ideas are asserted rather than fully explained. For instance, the claim that higher prices will make products inaccessible to low-wage consumers does not explain how this would affect consumption across the wider public, while the discussion of reduced production largely repeats the same cause-and-effect point. Develop each reason with more precise explanation or evidence, and consider acknowledging a limitation, such as the possibility that some consumers may continue buying sugary products despite price rises.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the ideas generally follow a logical order. Linking expressions such as “Furthermore,” “As a result” and “Therefore” help show relationships between points. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical: “Hence” and “Therefore” recur, and the second body paragraph repeats the idea that higher prices reduce sales and production rather than advancing the argument. Some references are also unclear, as in “the profit that these companies were making will reduce,” where the connection to the preceding point could be expressed more smoothly. Use a wider range of transitions and organise each paragraph around a distinct reason, with clearer progression from claim to explanation and example.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “processed,” “consumption,” “healthier alternatives” and “production,” so the main ideas are communicated clearly. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “adversely effect” and “show reluctance,” although some choices are inaccurate or unnatural. For example, “adversely effect” should be “adversely affect,” and “eat sugar in less quantity” is an awkward way to express reduced consumption. Spelling slips such as “prodcut” and “inturn” also reduce accuracy. To improve, choose more precise collocations and avoid repeating “sugary products” and “reduce” so often; alternatives such as “sugar-sweetened items,” “curb consumption” and “lower demand” would make the argument more fluent.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “because,” “which” and “if.” Most sentences are understandable, and errors rarely prevent the reader from following your argument. Some grammatical problems remain, however. In “which results in health issues,” the verb should agree with the plural “items” (“result”), and “a lot people” needs “of.” The sentence “Hence making such products more expensive…” is a fragment because it lacks a complete main clause. There are also punctuation and sentence-boundary issues, particularly where long cause-and-effect statements could be divided for clarity. Review agreement, articles and complete sentence structure, while continuing to use complex clauses accurately.
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