Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is argued that bewerage and other soda making companies are using excess8ve amount of sugar in their products, which is leading towards detrimental effects on human health. While increasing the price by adding more tax to these product should be a considerable option to avoid these products. Although, I totally agree woth that notion, there are some other steps to take to aware the public about the destructive effects of these sugar based items and making some strong legislation to mitigate with this problem.

One of the compelling reason to to support this idea is that these industries are making our life a hell on this earth by the side effects on the users health. For instance, researches on different soda making brands in the market revealed some shocking fcats that these are linked with even cancer causing propertise. Although these products became the part of our society because of their taste and addiction of the addatives insude there, its damaging the internal helath of the individuals gradually. Thus, these products must be replaced with some fresh juices introduction and promotion by the celebrities and social media inflencers, as they are the most effective and influencial social activists.

Furthermore, these products not only have sugar content but they also have some dangerous preservatives and artificial chemicals for taste and color propertise to give a fresh and vibrant look to their products.

To epitomise, there are several addatives found as linked with complex diseases in human bodies, in severe cases found as the cause of mutation in genes as well. Hence, the concerning departments must take some keen steps, either price increasing or any other way like strict monitering and frequent auditing to tackle with this alarming situation in a precise manner.

In conclusion, While taxation can significantly effcts the sales, other messure like to educate the society about the harm and side effects of using them on regular bases may also help to overcome the severity of the situation. Everyone should work with the public sector to resolve this issue by working as a one unit.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you agree that sugary products should cost more, and you also propose public education and stronger monitoring. These points address the question, and the discussion of health risks and possible alternatives is relevant. The response also shows some development through examples, such as promoting fresh juices and auditing manufacturers. However, the central proposal—making products more expensive—is not explained in enough detail: you could show how higher prices might reduce purchases or fund health campaigns. The claims about cancer and gene mutation are presented broadly, without specific support, and the second body paragraph mainly adds concerns about preservatives rather than developing the pricing argument. More balanced explanation of how taxation would work would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has an overall structure, with an introduction, supporting paragraphs and a conclusion, and the reader can follow the general argument from health concerns to possible action. Linking expressions such as “For instance,” “Furthermore” and “In conclusion” help signal stages in the discussion. However, progression is uneven: the first body paragraph combines health effects, addiction, juice promotion and social-media influence, while the next paragraph is brief and does not clearly connect its point about preservatives to the proposed price increase. Some transitions are mechanical or confusing, particularly “Although” at the start of the second sentence in the introduction. Group related ideas into focused paragraphs and make the relationship between each point and your position explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “detrimental effects,” “preservatives,” “legislation,” “taxation” and “auditing.” This shows an effort to discuss health and regulation beyond basic terms. However, spelling and word-choice errors are frequent and sometimes make the reader pause, as in “bewerage,” “fcats,” “propertise,” “addatives” and “monitering.” Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “making our life a hell” and “mitigate with this problem.” Repeated references to “products” and “effects” limit precision. Aim to use accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully; a smaller set of well-controlled terms will communicate your ideas more effectively than ambitious but inaccurate phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “which,” “as” and “although.” This gives the response some structural variety, but complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “While increasing the price … should be a considerable option” is an incomplete or awkwardly connected construction, and “One of the compelling reason to to support this idea” has agreement and infinitive errors. There are also problems with articles, plurals and sentence boundaries, as in “these product” and the opening “Although” clause. Work on building complete sentences with one clear main clause, then check subject–verb agreement and punctuation before adding subordinate clauses.

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