Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays many processed food and drinks contain high level of sugar which causes many serious illnesses . Many people belives that if we higher the prices of these processed food many individuals consume less sugar.

Firstly, if government higher the price of products in which sugar contain processed food and drinks were expensive many people may going to buy alternative food which are healthy for instance if government rises the prices of the artificial drinks peole are going to buy water which help them improve their kidney related problems.

Secondly ,if the prices are more high many people buy healthy food which has more nutrients in it it helps people to improve their health.

Furthermore, it is not gurantee that if we increase the prices of these food or drink it will help to improved health problems or people are going to buy these less,in addition people people may buy more food or drinks that are expensive to become fit in certain ggroups instead we should provid alternate food so people are going to buy more it also help them to buy easily healthy food moreover companies should avoid to make food and drinks that contain high number of sugar .This will helppeople to eat more healthy food so their is less health related problem i.e obesity , diabetic and urology related problem.

To conclude this essay i disagree with rises the prices of processed food for encouraging people .Instead we should provide a proper solution to this problem so we can solve this easily

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear disagreement in the conclusion and offer relevant reasons, including that higher prices may not reliably change purchasing habits and that healthier alternatives should be available. However, the position is not consistently clear: the opening suggests that raising prices could reduce sugar consumption, while the conclusion rejects this approach. The supporting ideas are also brief or unclear. For example, the claim that buying water will improve “kidney related problems” is not explained, and the point about people buying expensive products “to become fit in certain groups” is difficult to interpret. Develop a consistent position, explain each reason, and use a specific, relevant example to show how your proposed solution would work.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure, with an introduction, supporting points and a conclusion, and signposts such as “Firstly,” “Secondly” and “To conclude” help identify the stages of the argument. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow because the relationship between ideas is not always clear. The third body section combines several points—price increases, alternative foods, company responsibility and health problems—in one long sequence. Connectives such as “Furthermore,” “in addition” and “moreover” are crowded together rather than showing precise relationships, and repeated wording such as “people” weakens cohesion. Give each paragraph one main purpose, order its explanation logically, and use clear referencing to link examples to the point they support.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “processed food and drinks,” “alternative food,” “nutrients” and “health related problem,” so the topic is generally identifiable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate, sometimes making meaning unclear. Examples include “higher the prices” for raising prices, “artificial drinks” where a more precise term is needed, and “high number of sugar” instead of a natural quantity expression. Spelling errors such as “belives,” “peole,” “gurantee” and “provid” also reduce accuracy. Build a bank of precise topic vocabulary and check spelling and collocations; for instance, distinguish “sugary drinks” from “processed foods” and use consistent terms for health conditions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer conditional or subordinate structures, as in “if we increase the prices … it will help,” but complex sentences are often difficult to control. Frequent errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence boundaries make some ideas hard to understand. For example, “many people belives” needs subject–verb agreement, while “many people may going to buy” combines incompatible verb forms. The long sentence beginning “Furthermore, it is not gurantee” contains several clauses without clear punctuation, obscuring the argument. Practise accurate patterns such as “If prices rise, some consumers may choose healthier alternatives,” and divide longer ideas into shorter sentences. Check agreement, verb forms and full stops during revision.

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