Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It is often argued that the prices of manufactured food and drinks, containing high levels of sugar, should be increased so that it can discourage people to consume more sugar. This issue has atrracted considerable attention because these products are a threat to health. From my perspective, it is a great initiative but it alone may not be able to reduce the consuption of sugar.

While increasing the prices of sugary products can be one of the major reasons of some people to quit or have less sugar, there are many people who will still purchase these. At present, products that have high levels of sugar such as soft drinks, chocolates, sweets and many other packaged foods are extreamly available and affordable, which have a far-reaching consequences. Additionally, these products are liked by people of all ages and the consumption rate of these is beyond imagination. Excessive consumption of sugar increase the sugar level of blood, resulting in the increase of chronic diseases like obesity and type II diabetes. In recent time, a arge number of people are suffering from obesity and type II diabetes, which are considered as unpreventable diseases. If people do not control their diet, these diseses will increase markedly and lead to death.

However, increasing the prices only cannot decrease the consumption of sugar if people do not understand the reason behind it. Additionally, there are several compelling reasons for them not to be able to convert their eating patterns into a balanced diet overnight. As a result, they will still purchase sugary items even though these become expensive just to meet their habitual needs. Consequently, the consumption of sugar will remain the same. A case in point is Bangladesh, where the cost of commodities as well as any manufactured products are increasing rapidly, still people with high purchasing power buy those things. This indicates that even if the prices are high, people will adapt and continue their sugar consumption. It is crucial to note that increasing cost will restrict only people with low income to consume sugary items.

A balanced approach to control this issue is to create awareness among people so that they can know the effects of consuming sugar. It is imperative that the production authority should contribute to this by adding the amount of sugar level on the labels. Following this, they should alter sugar with other healthy substances so that people can have sweet items without increasing sugar levels.

In conclusion, increasing the prices of sugary products can have some positive effects on public health. However, I believe that this measure alone is not sufficient, and it should be accompanied by public awareness campaigns and other effective measures to encourage people to reduce their sugar consumption.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

Your position is clear throughout: you accept that higher prices may help, but argue that pricing alone is insufficient. You address the health risks and propose complementary measures, including public awareness and clearer product labels, so the response covers the task and supports its main view. The discussion of affordability and habitual purchasing is relevant, and the Bangladesh example helps illustrate why price increases may not change everyone’s behaviour. Some support is nevertheless broad rather than fully explained: the claim that people with high purchasing power will continue buying sugary products would be stronger with a specific example or explanation of how price affects different groups. Develop this reasoning and connect each proposed measure more explicitly to reduced consumption for a more complete response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay has a clear overall progression: it introduces your qualified position, considers the effects and limits of price increases, offers alternatives, and concludes by restating the argument. Paragraphing is appropriate, and signposts such as “However,” “As a result,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the stages of your reasoning. Within the first body paragraph, however, several points—availability, popularity, health effects, and disease—are placed in quick succession, so the relationship between them could be made more explicit. Some linking also feels repetitive, particularly the repeated use of “Additionally” and “As a result.” Use a wider range of transitions and clearer references between claims so that connections remain smooth without relying so heavily on signposting.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including phrases such as “far-reaching consequences,” “chronic diseases,” “purchasing power,” and “balanced approach.” These choices allow you to discuss health, consumer behaviour, and possible interventions. However, attempts at more formal or less common wording sometimes lead to inaccurate collocations or word forms: “reasons of some people to quit,” “the consumption rate of these,” and “unpreventable diseases” are not natural in context. There are also spelling errors, including “atrracted,” “consuption,” “extreamly,” and “diseses.” These do not prevent understanding, but they reduce precision and control. Aim for natural collocations and proofread spelling, especially when using topic-specific vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex structures, including a conditional sentence (“if people do not understand the reason behind it”) and a relative clause (“which are considered as unpreventable diseases”). Most ideas remain understandable, and the sentence structures show some variety. Some grammatical errors persist, however. For example, “so that it can discourage” has an unclear pronoun reference, “Excessive consumption of sugar increase” has a subject–verb agreement error, and “a arge number” contains an article error. In “which have a far-reaching consequences,” the plural verb and singular article do not agree with the noun phrase. Review agreement, articles, and pronoun reference, then check long sentences for accurate clause connections. This would build on your existing range and improve consistency.

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