Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

It is fact that nowadays, manufactured food and drink products contain higher level of unhealthy sugars. Sugars are critical to health to maintain calories but in a specific concentration. Higher concentration of sugar may causes different health problems. But, I completely disagree with the statement that sugary products should be made so expensive that encourage people to consume less sugary products.

It is fact that excessive sugar consumption can causes health disorders but sugar has vital importance all over the world. Sugary

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You state a clear position—“I completely disagree”—and identify a relevant concern: excessive sugar can cause health problems. However, the response addresses the task only minimally. It does not explain why making sugary products more expensive would be ineffective or unfair, nor does it develop an alternative approach or provide the requested supporting examples. The final fragment, “Sugary…”, leaves the argument unfinished. The response also falls 168 words short of the required minimum, so there is not enough explanation or evidence to support your position. To strengthen the essay, explain at least two reasons for your view, develop each with an example, and conclude by restating your position.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic sequence: you introduce the issue, mention health effects, and then state your disagreement. The contrast signalled by “But” helps show the relationship between the background and your position. However, the response is too brief to establish a clear progression of ideas or organise a developed argument into paragraphs. The repeated opening “It is fact” also makes the writing feel repetitive, while the final word, “Sugary”, creates an abrupt and incomplete ending. Build a clear structure with an introduction, separate body paragraphs for your reasons, and a conclusion. Use linking phrases to show how each reason supports your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “manufactured food and drink products”, “concentration”, “health disorders” and “consume less”. These choices make the subject clear, and there is some attempt to express ideas beyond very basic language. However, the range is narrow and several phrases are unnatural or imprecise, such as “higher level of unhealthy sugars” and “sugars are critical to health to maintain calories”. Repetition of “sugar” and “sugary products” also limits flexibility. Aim for more accurate collocations and a wider range of terms, such as “added sugar”, “sugar intake” and “health risks”. Check that each phrase expresses the intended meaning clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including the contrast in “But, I completely disagree…” and the clause beginning “which causes…”. Meaning is generally recoverable, but errors in verb forms and sentence construction are noticeable. For example, “Higher concentration of sugar may causes” should use the base verb after “may”, and “can causes” has the same problem. The phrase “that encourage people” also lacks a clear grammatical subject and does not form a complete, accurate construction. Articles and number agreement need attention in “higher level”. Practise modal verb patterns and check each sentence for a complete subject–verb structure before adding more complex clauses.

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