Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Most of the food and drink products have increased levels of sugar, that cause health issues. The prices of manufactured food and drink items, have high amount of sugar must be incrased so that consumers consume less sugar. I completely agree with the statement mentioned above.

There are two ways humans gets sugar in their food. The first is the natural way, by consuming fruits and vegitables that contain sugar. Whereas the other method is manufacturing the sugary products in factories. Now adays there is a range of manufactured food and drink sugary products available in markets, specifically for kids. Kids love to have sugary food and drinks in their meal.

Sugar products are not good for our health, particularly for kids and older persons. Food and drink items that contain high amount of sugar cause health isuues like diabetese, obesity and dimensia. Balanced diet for good health always have sugar from natural sources rather than products manufactured at industries.

The products contain high sugar content made expensive, the consumers avaoid to consume these products. If something is not good for health, it must be made expensive by the government. If the sugar products are out of budget range of individuals definitely they try not to buy these manufactured products. On the other side the natural sugar containg products, made less expensive so that people would buy these products, that includes fruits and vegitable to promote good health.

Mostly the companies advertising sugar containg products in an aattaractive way. The best approach is to reduce the prices of these products so that lots of people will purchase these products. These companies are only concerened aboout their business instead of consumer's health.

The government should take an action to reduce the prices of many manufactured food and drink products contain high level of sugar. Government should impose such stretegies tthat promotes good health, which include consuming less sugary products.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you state, “I completely agree,” and give relevant reasons, including health risks and the possibility that higher prices could discourage purchases. However, the response only partially develops the argument. The discussion of natural and manufactured sugar takes up space without clearly explaining why price increases are an effective or fair measure, and the claims about diabetes, obesity and dementia are not supported with examples or explanation. Most importantly, the final paragraph reverses your position: it says the government should “reduce the prices” of sugary products, although your argument is that they should cost more. Clarify this conclusion and develop the effects of higher prices with a specific example or explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has separate paragraphs for background, health effects, pricing and advertising, so the reader can identify its main topics. However, the overall progression is not consistently clear: the paragraph about advertising ends by recommending lower prices, which conflicts with the preceding argument and disrupts the line of reasoning. Some links are mechanical or unclear, such as “Whereas the other method” and “On the other side,” and ideas within paragraphs are sometimes placed beside one another without showing their relationship. For stronger organisation, make each paragraph advance one step in your argument, use accurate transitions, and ensure the conclusion follows from the reasons already presented.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “manufactured products,” “balanced diet,” “natural sources” and “consumer’s health,” which helps communicate the subject. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation and spelling errors make the writing less precise, for example “high amount of sugar,” “sugar containg products,” “aattaractive” and “stretegies.” Some expressions are also awkward, such as “out of budget range of individuals” and “sugar products.” Aim for more accurate collocations and vary repeated terms such as “products” and “sugar.” Proofreading spelling and choosing precise phrases would make your meaning easier to follow and strengthen the vocabulary used to discuss pricing and public health.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional idea in “If the sugar products are out of budget range … they try not to buy.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “Most of the food and drink products have increased levels of sugar, that cause health issues” has an unclear relative clause, while “There are two ways humans gets sugar” has subject–verb disagreement. Other examples include “The products contain high sugar content made expensive” and “The government should take an action,” where sentence structure or article use is inaccurate. Practise building complete clauses and checking agreement, articles and punctuation; clearer sentence patterns will help your ideas come through reliably.

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