Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In recent years, level of sugar increases in many manufactured food and drink products, which is a serious cause to many health problems. I disagree with the view of increasing prices for that products to reduce consumption of sugar.

To begin with, increasing price of products will only target people will low income. People with balance life and high income will still afford it. In all over the world there are high percent of people living life above than normal. For example, such type of people can easily spent on such type of products. As a result, which will do not have a major impact on the reduction of consumption of sugar.

Additionaly, most of the people uses traditional food and drinks which contain more amount of sugar.. other than that some natural food and drinks contain its natural sweetness which can also cause many health problems. For instance, milk and yugurt contains its natural oil and sweetness which can also makes major health problem and making other products will not reduce consumption of sugar.

In conclusion, consumption of sugar has increased in last few hours, which is a serious threat to many health problems. making expensive such product will do not effect more the consumption of sugar, but alternatives can be applied such as ban on such product and starting regular exercises.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

Your position is clear: you disagree with making sugary products more expensive, and you give two reasons—higher prices may not affect wealthier consumers, and sugar also comes from other foods. However, the response only partially develops the task. The first reason is asserted rather than supported with a convincing explanation, while the discussion of milk and yoghurt shifts toward natural sweetness without clearly showing how this answers the proposed price increase. The suggestion to ban products and promote exercise is also introduced briefly, without explaining how these alternatives would work. The response is 27 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to develop your argument. Add a relevant example and explain each point more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “To begin with” and “Additionally,” and a conclusion. This helps the reader identify your main position and supporting points. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear. For example, “As a result, which will do not have a major impact” does not connect the example to the claim in a complete, clear way. The second body paragraph moves from traditional foods to natural sweetness and then to the effect of making manufactured products more expensive, with the relationship between these ideas left implicit. Use fewer formulaic transitions and make the logical link between each reason, example, and conclusion explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “manufactured food and drink products,” “consumption of sugar,” “low income,” and “natural sweetness.” These choices make the subject clear, but the range is limited and several phrases are inaccurate or repetitive, which sometimes makes the meaning difficult to follow. For instance, “balance life and high income” does not clearly express the intended group, and “a serious threat to many health problems” uses an unsuitable collocation. Repeated phrases such as “such type of products” also reduce precision. Build a wider set of accurate expressions for discussing affordability, consumer behaviour, and health effects, and check collocations and spelling, including “yogurt” and “Additionally.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including a relative clause in “products, which is a serious cause…” and a conditional idea about people with higher incomes. However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and verb forms frequently make the reader work to understand your meaning. Examples include “people will low income,” “most of the people uses,” and “milk and yugurt contains.” The sentence beginning “As a result, which will do not…” is also incomplete and contains an incorrect verb construction. Practise building accurate subject–verb patterns and complete sentences before adding complexity. Careful proofreading for punctuation, such as the doubled full stop after “sugar,” would also improve clarity.

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