Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Many manufactured food products contains high levels of sugar which causes many seroius heath problems .I personallu believe that sugary produts must be lesson because of its darstic impact on our socity in terms of heath .Sugary productys makes people more antious dapressed ans make thwm to hate their body which they build by consuming more full of fats food.but makeing there products expensive just for to reduce their sales and to encourage people to consume less sugar will not be suitable for our community at all .we have ro make other rules and ragulations for less consumptions of them .because making these produts will implant many other factor ion society .bcause we could not make them unreachable they are importent factor of any sweet recipe .we can build a sese of hathy lifestyle among people making them sure who they use to eat heathy products insteat of fast food or junk food .we can bhuld societies saminars to encourage people to eat heathy espiaclly in oue school universities colleges and other educational instituats.by implimanting these kinds of strtigies we casn overcome thia problem .the othre fact that is vrey importent is to make people love exercise a workout for stay healthy .a walk daily after taking meal weill be benificial insteates of stying at home after cunsuming much calories by eathing .In conlusion, i would sy that making sugary produts expensives and difficult to buy is not a good act near me we can develop a sense of knowledge among our youth and elders also to take care of their health .In this way ww we can manage to make peoplr healthier.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion4.5
Lexical Resource4.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you oppose making sugary products more expensive and propose education and exercise instead. These ideas are relevant, and you give practical examples such as seminars in schools and universities and taking a daily walk after meals. This addresses the question, but the two sides of your reasoning are not developed equally. The health effects are mentioned briefly, while the reasons price increases would be unsuitable—such as the claim that these products are important for sweet recipes—need clearer explanation and support. The response would be stronger if you directly explained how education could reduce sugar consumption and compared its likely effectiveness with taxation, using a specific example or evidence.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable overall direction: it states your view, offers alternatives, and ends with a conclusion. However, nearly all the ideas are placed in one continuous paragraph, so the reader has little help distinguishing the argument from the proposed solutions. Connections between points are also sometimes unclear; for example, the move from products being important in recipes to building a healthy lifestyle is abrupt. Linking words such as “because,” “but,” and “in conclusion” are present, but they do not consistently show the relationship between ideas. Use separate paragraphs for your position, supporting reasons, alternatives, and conclusion, and make each paragraph develop one main point in a clear sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “health problems,” “regulations,” “healthy lifestyle,” and “educational institutions.” These choices show an effort to discuss public health and possible solutions. However, spelling errors and inaccurate word choices are frequent enough to make parts of the response difficult to understand, as in “antious,” “darstic impact,” and “implant many other factor.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “making people sure” and “difficult to buy.” Aim to use fewer, more accurately controlled expressions, and check spelling carefully. Learning topic-specific collocations such as “raise the price,” “reduce sugar consumption,” and “promote healthier eating habits” would make your argument clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences that connect reasons and examples, so there is some variety in structure. However, errors in agreement, sentence construction, and punctuation often make the meaning harder to follow. For instance, “food products contains” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “Sugary productys makes people” repeats this pattern. Several sentences run together without clear boundaries, particularly the section beginning “but makeing there products expensive.” Practise building accurate sentences with one main idea, then add a subordinate clause where appropriate. Check agreement and use full stops to separate complete thoughts; this will help your ideas come across more reliably.

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