Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There is an ongoing debate regarding many shops manufactured food and drink products made high levels of sugar , what types of causes many health issues.These types of products should ne made more costly to motivate individuals to consume less sweet products.I strongly agree with this statement .My preference is justified in upcoming paragraps with relevant examples.

To begin with,nowadays there are a lots of food and drink made high level of sugar . This is negative effect on people .The foremost one is that if people consume high level of sugar food and drink they face many disease .Such as diabities , collestor and many more.This is because , many people regular eat fast food and drink juice and differnt types of drinks. People do not go for exercise and they do not take care of their self .These types of condition individuals face health problems.

Moreover, people gain obesity , By this i mean if people cosume sugary products daily in their life , it can be not good for their health and also their brain. Nowadays ,sugary products should be more expensive so people not get buy this types of food .while, individuls consume high level of sugary products so at that time shopkeeper obtaind many profit .For example, youngster always like to eat sweets but they can not know in the future it can be very dangours for their fitness.

To conclude, i agree with this situation because nowadays people get high level of sugary products ,which causes many health problems.Such as, diabities , obesity and many more. I think people want to some guidence and encourage for their healh.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you state, “I strongly agree,” and return to agreement in the conclusion. You also identify relevant concerns, including diabetes and obesity, and mention that higher prices might discourage purchases. However, the response only partially develops the central proposal. It does not explain in detail how price increases would change buying habits, and the point that shopkeepers “obtaind many profit” is not clearly connected to the argument. The example about young people liking sweets is relevant but remains general and does not show a specific consequence or outcome. To strengthen the response, explain the likely effect of higher prices and support each main reason with a clearer example or explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. “To begin with” and “Moreover” signal the start of the main points, and the conclusion restates your position. However, progression within paragraphs is not always clear: the discussion moves from health effects to exercise, then to shopkeepers’ profits and young people without showing how each point connects to the proposal. Some linking phrases are also used awkwardly, such as “while” before a statement that does not contrast with the previous idea. Repeated references to sugary products and health problems make the argument feel repetitive. Group related ideas together and use clear cause-and-effect links to guide the reader.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “manufactured food and drink products,” “consume,” “obesity” and “health problems,” so the main subject is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several phrases are inaccurate or unnatural, which sometimes makes the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “made high levels of sugar” does not clearly express that products contain sugar, and “people not get buy this types of food” is hard to interpret. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “diabities,” “collestor” and “dangours.” Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing ingredients, prices and health effects, and check spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional structure in “if people consume high level of sugar food and drink they face many disease.” However, complex attempts are often faulty, and frequent errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles and punctuation can make the reader work to understand your meaning. For instance, “This is negative effect on people” is missing an article, while “people regular eat” has an incorrect adverb position and verb form. The opening sentence is also difficult to parse because several clauses are joined without clear grammatical structure. Practise writing shorter, complete sentences first, then add one controlled subordinate clause at a time. Check subject–verb agreement and sentence boundaries during revision.

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