Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is often argued by some people that many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. So, people believe that sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Some might disagree with this statement, but I completely agree.

There are multiple benefits of making manufactured foods or sugary products more expensive. Firstly, people are less likely to buy them if they cost more. Therefore, consumers are not able to buy more expensive products and they are encouraged to purchase healthier alternatives. Take an example of Japan, where the government has increased the prices of fast food and sugary products. As a result, their nations looks healthy than other countries.

Secondly, by making manufactured foods or sugary products more expensive people's health ratio would be incraesed and they would buy healthy foods instead of fast foods. For instance, a recent survey conducted in France revealed that thousand of people's health improved by making sugary products more expensive. Thus, by making sugary products more expensive is very beneficial.

In conclusion, by making sugary products more expensive is very beneficial and gives us a positive feadback. Although some people might disagree with this because they are not able to buy manufactured foods or sugary products. So, I completely agree that sugary products should be made more expensive to encourages people to consume less sugar.

To sum up even though by making sugary products or fast foods more expensive people encourages to buy healthy food and thats why their health would improved.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

Your position is clear: you state, “I completely agree,” and return to this view in the conclusion. You also give two reasons, linking higher prices with healthier choices and improved health. However, these points are mostly asserted rather than explained, and the examples are not convincingly supported: the claims about Japan and a French survey lack detail and may seem unreliable. The response therefore addresses the topic only partially, with limited development of its ideas. It also contains 224 words, which is 26 words below the required minimum; 38 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. Develop each reason with a credible, specific explanation or example, and meet the minimum length.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. However, progression is weakened by repeated claims: the conclusion restates that higher prices are beneficial, and “To sum up” introduces another conclusion that largely repeats the same point. Some links are mechanical or unclear, particularly “Thus, by making sugary products more expensive is very beneficial,” which does not connect the reasoning smoothly. The final sentence also introduces “fast foods” without developing that idea. Aim for one focused conclusion and make each paragraph advance a distinct, clearly connected reason.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary such as “healthier alternatives,” “consumers,” and “manufactured products,” so the reader can follow the general topic. However, the range is limited and several phrases are repeated, especially “making sugary products more expensive” and “healthy foods.” Some word choices or forms are inaccurate or unnatural, including “health ratio,” “positive feadback,” and “their nations looks healthy.” Spelling errors such as “incraesed” and “thousand” also reduce accuracy. These issues make expression less precise, even though the main message remains understandable. Build a wider set of accurate terms for health outcomes, pricing and consumer behaviour, and check spelling and collocations before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt some complex sentences, including “Although some people might disagree with this because…” and a sentence beginning “where the government has increased…”. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to make several sentences awkward or difficult to follow. For example, “their nations looks healthy” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “by making sugary products more expensive is very beneficial” uses an incorrect sentence structure. In the final sentence, “people encourages” and “their health would improved” contain agreement and verb-form errors. Practise building clear subject–verb sentences and checking agreement and verb forms, especially after modal verbs and in clauses beginning with “by.”

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