Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, many people are consuming manufactured food and drink products which contain high levels of sugar. This has increased so many health problems among them. I agree that sugary products should be made more expensive allowing people to consume less sugar.

On the one hand, the processed food and drinks include high volume of sugar, which leads to serious health issues such as diabetes and weight gain. For example, If more amount of sugar has consumed per day then it also leads to high diabetes, and the person has to take insulin injections to balanced sugar level in their body. Moreover, it leads to obesity if proper care and control in our brain was not done while eating food and drink products. Sometimes, people have cravings to eat these sugary products and it will consumed more. However, moderate sugar intake cannot cause any health issues and our body can physically be fit.

On the other hand, sugary products should be made more costly so that people avoid buying manufactured items and this way people will consume less sugar. Moreover, people can choose food items which contains natural sugar such as fruits, sugarcane, dates, jaggery, and so on. As a result, their physical health will be better, they will also feel good and energetic throughout the day and it will also not cause any serious health problems.

In conclusion, with proper care, control in our mind, and increasing prices of sugary products, the consumption of sugar decreases which helps people to stay healthy and their life expectancy can increase.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you agree that higher prices could reduce sugar consumption, and the conclusion returns to this view. You address both the health risks and the proposed price increase, with relevant examples such as diabetes, obesity, and choosing fruit instead. This meets the task well overall. Some points, however, are less fully developed: the claim that higher prices will change buying habits is asserted rather than supported with a specific explanation or example, and the discussion of moderate sugar intake briefly qualifies your argument without clarifying its relevance. To strengthen the response, explain how price changes might affect different consumers and develop one or two examples more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting related points, and a conclusion. The progression from health effects to the proposed solution is easy to follow, and signposts such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help orient the reader. This gives the response a coherent arrangement. However, some linking is mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “Moreover” and “As a result,” and the first body paragraph combines several ideas—health effects, cravings, and moderate intake—without clearly showing how they connect. Use a wider range of transitions and make the relationship between each supporting point and your main argument more explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “manufactured,” “health problems,” “diabetes,” “obesity,” “cravings,” and “consumption.” These choices make the main ideas understandable, and there are attempts to use more specific terms. However, the range is limited and several word combinations are unnatural or imprecise, such as “high volume of sugar,” “high diabetes,” and “control in our brain.” Repetition of “sugary products” and “health” also limits flexibility. Aim to learn common collocations and use more precise wording—for example, describe products as having a “high sugar content” and refer to “blood sugar levels.” This would make your argument clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “which,” “if,” and “so that.” The overall meaning is generally recoverable, and the essay has some control of sentence structure. However, errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction remain noticeable. For example, “If more amount of sugar has consumed” needs a correctly formed passive construction, while “it will consumed more” has an incorrect verb form. In “food items which contains,” the verb does not agree with its plural subject. Work on accurate clause construction and subject–verb agreement, and check each sentence for a complete, correctly formed verb phrase. More reliable accuracy would support your attempts at complex sentences.

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