Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years, many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which cause many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. I strongly agree with this statement.

To commence with, there are several reasons why I believe that sugary products should be made more expensive. The main reason is that many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which can cause many health problems. For example, consuming too much sugary food and drink may damage some important organs in our bodies. Eating sugary food is extremely detrimental to people with diabetes. In addition, People may face long-term health problems and higher medical expenses. As a result, some of our body organs may gradually become damaged. Therefore, I think that we should maintain a balance and eat sugary food and drink less often.

On the other hand, another important point is that sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. This is because people may not be able to buy as many sugary foods if prices become higher. For instance, young children tend to like sweet and sugary foods, and young people may persuade their parents to buy more sugary products. If prices increase, they may not be able to buy these products as often. As a result, people may consume less sugary food, which could play a crucial role in improving public health. People may also become more health-conscious. Overall, This could reduce sugar consumption and improve public health.

In conclusion, I think we should maintain a balance and avoid consuming too much sugar. The government should make sugary products more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. School teachers should also teach their students about the health problems caused by eating too much sugary food.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear from the introduction, and you give relevant reasons for agreeing, including possible health effects and the idea that higher prices could reduce children’s access to sugary products. However, the discussion is repetitive: the claim that sugary products contain high levels of sugar is repeated, and the health effects are described generally rather than supported with a specific example or explanation of how price increases would address them. The conclusion adds teachers’ education as a further measure, but this point is not developed in the essay. The response is 244 words, six words below the required minimum; this limits the space available to develop your reasons fully. Extend the explanation and support each main point with a concrete example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the main ideas are generally easy to follow. Linking phrases such as “To commence with,” “For instance” and “In conclusion” help signal stages in the argument. However, progression within the body paragraphs is not always smooth: the first paragraph moves from organ damage to diabetes, medical expenses and balance without clearly connecting these points. The second paragraph repeats the claim that higher prices reduce consumption, and “On the other hand” suggests a contrast that is not really present. Use fewer formulaic transitions and make each paragraph develop one central reason in a clear sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the topic and your position, including phrases such as “long-term health problems,” “medical expenses” and “health-conscious.” However, the range is limited by repeated wording, especially “sugary products,” “high levels of sugar” and “consume less sugar.” Some expressions are imprecise or unnatural, such as “damage some important organs in our bodies” and “maintain a balance,” which do not specify the health effects or the intended dietary approach. There is also inconsistent capitalisation of “People” and “This,” though these are presentation issues rather than vocabulary choices. Build a more precise range for discussing nutrition, health risks and pricing, and avoid repeating the same key phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mixture of simple sentences and longer structures, including a conditional sentence (“If prices increase, they may not be able to buy these products as often”) and a relative clause (“which could play a crucial role in improving public health”). Meaning is generally clear, but there are some errors in agreement and sentence control. In the opening, “products contain …, which cause” has an unclear reference and agreement; revise the clause so it clearly refers to the products or the sugar. The sentence beginning “Eating sugary food is extremely detrimental to people with diabetes” is grammatically complete, but the following ideas are joined in a somewhat repetitive sequence. Check capitalisation after sentence boundaries and aim for more varied, accurately controlled complex sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.