Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

There are many compaines, which produce foods and drinks products containing high level of sucarose in diet, leading to illness like obesity among the individuals. In some countries, the price of soft drinks and food have increased for encouroaging less consumation of sugar. I strongly agree, that such act of policy will promote the consumers to have healthy intakes in their daily routine.

One of the main reason, that the individuals get attracted with the food advertisments seen on social media. Young childerens like to try tasty items, in such cases they do not attempt to know about the nutrition value in it. In result, at younger age some kids suffer from diabetes, obesity and heart illness to avoid proper education should be given in the society. For example, companies that sell edible products should provide an education related to nutritive values and also the rate of the product should be rised. Therefore, an individuals will try to buy health food and can save money to help other who are ill.

Furthermores, government should promote to have a public awareness regarding the illness caused by the excessive intake of sugar. Although, education might save but the taxes that is save can be used for the il

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You state a clear position—“I strongly agree”—and connect higher prices with reducing sugar consumption. You also introduce relevant points about advertising, children’s food choices, health problems, and public awareness. However, the response only partially develops the argument: the link between raising prices and healthier choices is asserted rather than explained, and the example about companies providing nutrition education does not directly show how higher prices would help. The final paragraph is unfinished, so the discussion and conclusion are missing. The response is also 44 words below the required minimum, which limits the opportunity to support your ideas. Develop both the benefits and any relevant limitations of price increases, then finish with a clear conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to organise the response into paragraphs, and expressions such as “One of the main reason” and “Furthermore” signal a move to new points. However, progression is difficult to follow because several ideas are crowded together: advertising, children’s nutrition knowledge, illness, education, product prices, and helping sick people appear without clear links. Some connectors are used inaccurately or mechanically, as in “In result” and “Although, education might save,” and the last sentence breaks off, leaving the argument without a conclusion. To improve, give each paragraph one main point, explain how it supports your position, and use linking phrases only where the relationship between ideas is clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “nutrition value,” “public awareness,” “excessive intake of sugar,” and “obesity.” This gives the response some relevant range, but word choice, spelling, and collocation errors are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning harder to understand. Examples include “sucarose” for “sugar,” “food advertisments,” “healthy intakes,” and “health food.” Some expressions are also imprecise, such as “the rate of the product” when you mean its price. Build accuracy by learning common collocations for health and consumer behaviour, and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you explain the effects of price increases clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a relative clause in “products containing high level of sucarose … leading to illness” and a conditional-style explanation about children’s choices. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur frequently enough to make parts difficult to follow. For example, “One of the main reason” needs a plural noun, while “the price of soft drinks and food have increased” has a subject–verb agreement problem. The sentence beginning “Although, education might save” is incomplete, and the final sentence is cut off. Practise building complete sentences with one clear main clause, then check agreement, articles, and punctuation.

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