Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

While, I completely agree that majority manufactured eatery products contain high proportions of sugar and could cause heath issues if consume in excess whereas I disagree with the statement to make sugary items expensive inorder to discourage its consumption rather than introducing optimistic approach toward its dieteray control.

Generally, everything we eat in a day contains a percentage of sugar perhaps not all the food that have some amount could harm us, however, people those who are fond of eating bakery items such as cakes, chocolates paddies, candies or drink sugary bewerages may suffer a range of health issues likewise : obesity, diabetes and metabolic disturbances etc. High consumption disturb organs physiological and deteriorate hormonal compliances because of that survivor can struggle with a long-term negative consequences which at worse could lead to death. For instance, WHO reported high mortality rates due diabetes Type 1 and reasons stated was increase sugar intake.

To discourage an excess consumption at expense of hprice for sugar containing products is not an effective hypothesis as it would disrupt the economical and commercial growth because the share gained by the huge sales contributes to the countries GDP and people shifting from sweet market due high prices will bring a great loss. So to compensate and encourage low intake an awareness regimens could work far better , as many healthcare bodies should officially conduct workshops , seminars and lectures to guide efficient control of sugar intake in diet. For example,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You state a position—disagreeing with higher prices—and offer two relevant lines of reasoning: possible economic effects and education as an alternative. However, the response addresses the proposal only partially, as the economic claim is asserted rather than explained, and the suggested awareness programmes are not developed into a clear, practical case. The health paragraph gives examples of conditions, but the WHO reference is vague and does not clearly support the specific claim about Type 1 diabetes. The final “For example,” is left unfinished, so the promised supporting example is missing. The response is also six words below the required minimum. Develop each reason with a specific explanation or example, and finish with a conclusion that restates your position.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

There is some organisation: the opening gives your view, the next paragraph discusses health effects, and the final paragraph presents an alternative to price increases. This gives the reader a basic sense of the response’s direction. However, progression is weakened by long, overloaded sentences and links that do not clearly express the relationship between ideas. For example, the opening uses “whereas” to connect several claims, while “So to compensate” does not make clear what is being compensated for. The final paragraph ends abruptly at “For example,” and there is no concluding paragraph. Use one main point per paragraph, connect each reason explicitly to your position, and complete the example and conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “metabolic disturbances,” “mortality rates,” “commercial growth,” and “awareness.” This shows an effort to discuss health and economic consequences beyond basic terms. However, many choices are inaccurate or unnatural and sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow: “manufactured eatery products,” “chocolates paddies,” “economical growth,” and “efficient control” are examples. Spelling errors such as “heath,” “bew­erages,” and “dieteray” also reduce clarity. Aim for precise, familiar collocations rather than overly technical wording: for instance, “processed food products,” “economic growth,” and “manage sugar intake.” Proofread spelling and check that each word fits its context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt complex sentences and use some subordinate clauses, such as “people … may suffer …” and “because of that …,” but these structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make parts difficult to understand. Examples include “While, I completely agree … whereas I disagree,” which creates a confusing sentence structure, and “if consume in excess,” which lacks a clear subject and correct verb form. There are also problems with articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries, as in “High consumption disturb organs” and the long sentence beginning “To discourage an excess consumption.” Use shorter, complete sentences first, then add one well-controlled clause at a time. Check subject–verb agreement and ensure every conditional clause has a subject and verb.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.