Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Its true that food that contained high amount of sugar is caused different types of diseases. I strongly agree with the statement.

Overall bringing up the price of products is very helpfull for the younger generation to stop to buy it. This only possible by the coperation of manufacturer and also government role is also very importanat for it. Highly sugar contained food cause various types of diseases mostly common disease is diabetes. It easily attacked on all aged group of pupils they could not see wheather it was young or old. In my perspective govt should ban those products that contained high amount of sugar or other valueable option is to increase the price, doing this sugary items are not accessible and easily approachable for everyone. The example i discuss here from my country, I lived in Pakistan sugary products are very common like food includes cakes, pastry and dairy products are common and less expensive that why the main reason everyone is accessible for everyone. If our govt should increase the prices by doing strict actions so it could be controllable. While we discuss about the drinks however they also common includes soft drinks, sugar cane juices and slush. They are very common and easily in available for everyone.

In conclusion, this should be controllable by taking strict action of government and as well as coperation of the manufacturing industry so the would be controllable. If we need to save our child in future from a diseases like diabets we should tooks such step. It would be more valueable for future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the opening: “I strongly agree,” and you give relevant reasons, including the link between sugary products and diabetes and the idea that higher prices could reduce access. The Pakistan examples of cakes, dairy products and drinks also help connect the argument to a real context. However, the response develops the government’s role and possible bans more than it explains how price increases would change people’s choices. Some claims, such as sugary food affecting “all aged group[s],” are broad and need support or qualification. To strengthen the response, explain the expected effect of higher prices and add a specific example or evidence, while keeping the focus on the proposed price increase.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has an identifiable structure: an introduction, a main paragraph with reasons and examples, and a conclusion that restates the position. This gives the reader a basic overall route through the argument. Within the main paragraph, however, several points are crowded together, and the discussion moves from price increases to bans, then to food and drinks without clear transitions or separate development. Phrases such as “Overall” and “In conclusion” help signal stages, but connections such as “While we discuss about the drinks” are awkward and do not clearly show how the point relates to the argument. Use distinct paragraphs for the policy argument and examples, and link each example explicitly to the claim it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “sugar,” “diseases,” “diabetes,” “manufacturer,” and “government,” so the subject is generally clear. There are also attempts to use more formal expressions, such as “strict actions” and “accessible.” However, the range is limited and several words or phrases are repeated, particularly “common” and “easily.” Some choices are inaccurate or unnatural, including “valuable option,” “sugar cane juices,” and “the main reason everyone is accessible,” which can make the intended meaning difficult to follow. Spelling errors such as “helpfull,” “coperation,” and “diabets” also affect clarity. Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing affordability, consumption and public-health measures, and check spelling and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, and the reader can usually identify your main position. However, control of sentence structure and verb forms is inconsistent, especially in longer sentences. For example, “food that contained high amount of sugar is caused different types of diseases” has problems with tense, article use and the verb pattern; “If our govt should increase the prices … so it could be controllable” also does not form a clear conditional sentence. There are further issues with agreement and sentence boundaries, as in “sugary items are not accessible and easily approachable for everyone.” Practise building accurate complex sentences with clear subjects and verbs, and use punctuation to separate complete ideas. Greater accuracy would make your reasoning easier to follow.

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