Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, the majority of manufactured food and drink products consist of excessive amount of sugar and it is evident that numerous individuals faced to obesity or Diabetic, because they had paid a scant attention to their diets. Some people consider that price of sugary products should be higher, in order to recuce daily sugar consumption, while others hold an opposite view. From my standpoint, this is not suitable way to tackle this problem.

To begin with, increasing prices of sweets can have a detrimental effect on people who live in poverty, due to the fact that they will not have affort to purchase minimal amount of product for their basic needs. Futhermore, I firmly believe that the majority of people will not interup buing feezy drinks or sweet food. To reinforce my idea, people are already addicted on these kinds of products and refusing on buying sweets is almost imposible for them. So they will purchase these products; however this trend will impact negatively on their budget. Ultimatley, I firmly believe that this idea cant provide positive consequences, it can only affect individuals' budget.

On the other hand, to tackle this issue, other sectors should play a key role and take this problem into consideration. To illustrate this, the government should impose rules for food manufacturing companies and limit sugar level in food. Also, the education ministry has to rise awareness among youngsters and hold lessons about results which can be triggered by eating products that includes high levels of sugar. As a result, This problem should be fixed by other sectors such as the government and education ministry.

To conslude, increasing prices of sugary products will not fix this situation and even it will be deteriorated, while other alternatives can alleviate it more rapidly and easily.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you disagree that higher prices are a suitable solution, and the conclusion restates this view. You address the prompt with two relevant lines of reasoning: the financial impact on people with low incomes and alternatives involving government regulation and education. The examples of limiting sugar in manufactured food and teaching young people help keep the response focused. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For instance, the claim that people are addicted and will continue buying sugary products needs support or qualification, and the effect on poorer consumers could be linked more directly to why a price increase would be unfair or ineffective. Developing these points more precisely would make the argument more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate body paragraphs presenting your reasoning and alternatives, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with,” “On the other hand,” and “To conclude” make the stages easy to follow. The main progression—from opposing a price increase to proposing regulation and education—is also logical. At times, however, linking is mechanical or the relationship between ideas is not fully clear. “So they will purchase these products” repeats the preceding claim, while “As a result” does not clearly show how the proposed actions lead to the stated outcome. Some sentences also contain several connected claims, making the paragraph less smooth. Use referencing and transitions more selectively, and explain the links between each reason and your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “detrimental effect,” “impose rules,” “limit sugar level,” and “raise awareness.” These choices show an effort to discuss health, policy and education rather than relying only on basic terms. However, inaccurate word choice, collocation and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause. Examples include “faced to obesity,” “addicted on,” “refusing on buying,” and “feezy drinks”; several intended expressions are not clear or natural. There are also spelling errors such as “recude,” “affort” and “imposible.” Build accuracy by learning common word partnerships and checking spelling, while keeping the useful topic vocabulary you already attempt.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and longer sentences with subordinate clauses, for example “increasing prices of sweets can have a detrimental effect on people who live in poverty, due to the fact that…” This gives the response some structural variety, and the main argument is generally understandable. However, errors in sentence construction and grammatical forms recur. In “the majority of manufactured food and drink products consist of excessive amount,” the article and noun phrase need adjustment; “people who live in poverty…will not have” also needs a more accurate construction for the intended meaning. Agreement is inconsistent in “products that includes,” and the final sentence joins contrasting ideas awkwardly. Review articles, subject–verb agreement, verb patterns and sentence boundaries, then proofread complex sentences carefully.

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