Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Almost every country is facing some major health concern including high level of blood sugar. I completely disagree to increase price of sugary products because it has become a part our daily life.

The most concerning and challenging part, which has now become a trend is to make product more expensive so people will consume that rarely. Making the product unaffordable is never a good idea, as it will become a luxurious product in the near future. Experts of economics never suggests to increase the price of the product which are consumed in our daily purposes. Sugary products are also used to make medicines, cosmetic products as well as many biotechnologies are developed with the help of these sugars. Altogether, making sugar expensive will results in increasing the price of many products which are consumed for daily purposes.

Moreover, health professionals should persuade people to consume less sugar as well as government should also run a sugar-free campaign which will eventually address these kinds of problem at the large scale. There are more ways to convinence people to consume sugar in a minimal amount it will lead to many advantages like they will realise that sugar is the root cause of all the health problems in our body. For instance, Dubai government has awarded 1 gram of gold to their citizens who reduces the weight in 10 days and the result was witnessed that entire country's sugar consumption was decreased by 15%. Since, there are many possible ways to make people aware to consume less sugar without increasing the price of it.

In conclusion, Making sugar unaffordable will not lead to a fruitful end instead it will make the daily livelyhood products expensive.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the opening: you disagree with making sugary products more expensive, and the conclusion maintains that view. You address the proposed price increase and offer alternatives, including public campaigns and incentives, with the Dubai example providing relevant support. This gives the response a sound basis and covers the main parts of the question. However, some reasoning is not fully developed or precisely connected to the issue. For example, the claim that sugar is used in medicines and cosmetics does not explain why sugary food and drink products should remain affordable. The economic argument and the campaign proposal would be stronger with clearer explanation of how they would reduce health problems while avoiding a price rise. Develop these links and qualify broad claims such as sugar being the root cause of all health problems.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a coherent overall structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present reasons and alternatives, and a conclusion restates your position. Linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “For instance,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the main stages. The progression is generally logical, but some connections are mechanical or unclear. In the second body paragraph, the sentence beginning “There are more ways to convince people” runs several ideas together, and “Since” at the start of the final sentence leaves the relationship between the ideas incomplete. The first body paragraph also moves from affordability to economics and then to medicines and cosmetics without fully showing how each point supports the central argument. Use clearer topic sentences and make each paragraph’s reasoning progress step by step.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “health concern,” “unaffordable,” “sugar-free campaign,” and “consumption.” Some choices show an attempt to express more specific ideas, and the meaning is generally understandable. However, inaccurate word choice and collocation sometimes make the argument less natural: “consume that rarely,” “daily purposes,” and “fruitful end” do not express the intended meanings precisely. There are also spelling and word-form errors, including “convinence,” “livelyhood,” and “reduces” where the sentence requires a different form. Aim for natural topic collocations such as “reduce sugar consumption,” “everyday products,” and “a successful outcome.” Proofreading spelling and checking phrases in context would improve precision and fluency.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “which,” “as,” and “who,” and most of the argument remains understandable. Some sentences are controlled, such as “Making the product unaffordable is never a good idea.” However, errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries recur. Examples include “Experts of economics never suggests,” “it will results,” and “the result was witnessed that,” while “a part our daily life” is missing a necessary grammatical element. The sentence beginning “There are more ways” joins clauses without clear punctuation, and “Since” introduces an incomplete dependent clause. Review subject–verb agreement and clause boundaries, then edit each sentence for articles and verb forms. More accurate control of these patterns would make your varied structures clearer.

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