Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Yes,I completely agree with this proposed solution.Because sugar is not good for anyone.It cause many health related concerns people are addicted to use sugar in everything.They seem it hard to reduce the amount of sugar from thier daily food.

Those people who have health related issues are not avoiding the intake of sugary products.

In my family i saw number of my relatives have diabates, instead of avoiding the sugar intake they consume alot and the reason is that they are used to it.They find it hard to remove the sugar usage compelty from thier life.Which results, thier bad health and thier sugar level increase and i saw certain death of diabetic people beacuse of extra intake of sugar and they does not avoid it.

If the sugary products will be expensive so there will be less consumption of sugar because everyone is not able to afford it commonly and only those people will use the sugary products that seem it's really need and it will be out of the hand from a common man.It seems that only people will get the sugary product that find it actualuse and those people who are diabetic find it hard to get beacuse if common man is not able to get it so for the diabetic person firstly it is not good and second no one allow to consume it beacause it is expensive.This will be the great idea to encurage people not to consume the sugary prodcuts as long as they need it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear opinion in the opening—“I completely agree”—and keep your response focused on whether higher prices could reduce sugar consumption. The family example about relatives with diabetes is relevant and helps explain why habitual consumption can be difficult to change. However, the argument is only partly developed: the claim that making products expensive will reduce consumption is repeated, but you do not explain in detail how price changes might influence choices or consider possible limitations, such as people switching to other sugary foods. Some points are also unclear, particularly the claim that diabetic people would find products harder to obtain. Develop each main reason with a clearer explanation and a specific example to make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

Your response follows a basic sequence: you state your position, describe a family example, and then explain the proposed effect of higher prices. This gives the reader a general sense of your argument. However, the ideas are not clearly divided into paragraphs, and the progression within the final section is difficult to follow. Several points about affordability and diabetic consumers are repeated, while links such as “Which results” and “This will be the great idea” do not clearly show how one idea follows from another. Use separate paragraphs for your position, supporting reasons, and conclusion. Then connect each point with accurate, varied transitions and make references such as “it” or “those people” clearly identify what you mean.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “sugary products,” “health related issues,” “diabetic,” and “consumption,” so the reader can identify the subject of your argument. However, the range is limited and several expressions are repeated, especially references to sugar intake and sugary products. Some word choices or combinations are unclear or unnatural, such as “remove the sugar usage,” “actualuse,” and “out of the hand from a common man.” Spelling errors, including “diabates,” “thier,” and “encurage,” also reduce accuracy. Build a wider set of precise phrases for discussing price, affordability, habits, and health, and check spelling and collocations carefully so your meaning is consistently easy to understand.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both short statements and longer sentences that express reasons and results, but the range of structures is limited and longer sentences are often difficult to control. Errors occur frequently in verb forms and agreement: “It cause” should be “It causes,” and “they does not avoid it” should be “they do not avoid it.” Sentence boundaries and punctuation also need attention; for example, “Yes,I completely agree with this proposed solution.Because…” separates a dependent clause incorrectly and omits spaces after punctuation. Other sentences join several ideas without clear grammatical links, making the relationships harder to follow. Practise forming complete sentences, checking subject–verb agreement, and using conjunctions and punctuation to connect ideas accurately.

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