Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-24
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Nowadays many manufactured items of food and drink conatins high level of sugar which may be affect the health of people. Moreover, in order to prevent the excessive consumption of sugary products, some exerts suggest that sugar products must be made expensive in order to reduce the consumption. And I think this method is not more important than they suggest and we need to think about something which have lesser impact on community which is below the poverty line.
Regarding the manufactered products which conatins high level of sugar, some experts suggest that they should be made more expansive in order to prevent the excessive consumption. For instance, the prices of the sugary food products like, sweets, soft drinks and some other bakkery products must be made unaffordable in order to preclude the excessive consumption which will be helpful for those who have the health problems.
On the other hand, some practitioners suggest that increasing the price of sugary products is not a viable solution. Specially, It affects the people who live beow the poverty line because he or she cannot buy the basic needs for their family. For instance, when the government increase the price of food like cake or drink like soft drink. So it affects the poor people which donot suffered health problems yet.
Lastly, I conclude that, government should not increse the prices of sugary products just for the sake to avoide the health problems. They need some other methods to restict the usage of products on those which have the health issues.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
Your position is that raising prices is not the best solution, and you give a relevant reason: it could burden people living below the poverty line. The examples of sweets, soft drinks and cakes also keep the response connected to the topic. However, the argument is only partly developed. The opening says the method is “not more important than they suggest,” which makes your exact view difficult to understand, and the conclusion proposes other methods without explaining what they are. The claim that price rises affect poor people who do not yet have health problems also needs clearer reasoning. State your position directly, then explain and support two reasons for it, while acknowledging the health benefits that supporters expect.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting contrasting views, and a conclusion. This gives the reader an overall route through your argument, and phrases such as “On the other hand” signal a change in viewpoint. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear or mechanical. The first body paragraph largely repeats the suggestion from the introduction, while the second moves from price increases to their effect on poor households without fully connecting the steps. The sentence beginning “For instance, when the government increase…” is incomplete, which interrupts the flow. Use topic sentences that state each paragraph’s main point, and connect examples to that point with a complete explanation. Clearer references to who “they” and “those” mean would also improve cohesion.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “excessive consumption,” “sugary products,” “poverty line” and “viable solution,” so the reader can follow the subject. There is also some attempt to vary wording through “experts” and “practitioners.” However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation and spelling errors make parts less clear or natural. For example, “made expansive” appears to mean “made more expensive,” and “preclude the excessive consumption” is an awkward way to express reducing consumption. Spellings such as “manufactered,” “bakkery” and “avoide” also detract from accuracy. Build a bank of natural phrases for discussing taxation, affordability and public health, and check spelling and word forms during revision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “products which contains high level of sugar” and a reason clause beginning “because.” These attempts show some range, but complex structures are often faulty, and frequent errors can make the reader pause. Examples include subject–verb agreement in “products…contains” and “the government increase,” the incorrect construction “may be affect,” and the incomplete sentence “So it affects the poor people…” after a full stop. Articles and plurals also need attention, as in “high level” and “the health problems.” Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement, verb forms and sentence boundaries. More accurate control of these basics will make your argument easier to follow.
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