Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this period of modernity and globalization, it is clearly observed that most of the manufactured food items and soft drinks have high sugar level which ultimately creates many health issues. It is suggested by many people that sugary products should be priced high to encourage people to consume less sugar. For instance, it is causing obesity and diabetes among young population group. In my opinion, I strongly agree with this notion and my opinion will be discussed in further paragraphs with a suitable conclusion.

Supporting my agreement to the given statement, I firmly believe that many packaged foods and drinks have detrimental effects on our health. To cite an example, potato chips which taste amazingly better contain harmful tasting salts which has numerous side effects. Furthermore cold drinks contain excessive amount of sugar to attract kids and adolescents For instance, kids and college goers who mainly eat burgers, pizzas at restaurants also orders soft drinks such as Coca-cola, Pepsi etc.

Explaining some of the another supporting points in favor of this statement, it is true that factory-made foods and cold drinks can be addictive. As a consequence, it is extremely difficult to eradicate the issue completely from our society.

In conclusion, as numerous manufactured products are found to be containing excessive sugars which is deleterious for human being, high tax should be levied to make it more expensive. It will eventually demotivate public to make future purchase for themselves. I believe that aforementioned points are strongly supporting my view point.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you strongly agree that sugary products should cost more, and you mention relevant health concerns such as obesity and diabetes. However, the response only partly develops the central argument about using higher prices to reduce sugar consumption. The examples about chips, soft drinks, and young consumers describe unhealthy products, but do not explain how a price increase would change purchasing habits or why it would be effective. The point that factory-made foods can be addictive is relevant, yet it is left unexplained and may even complicate the case for taxation. Develop two focused reasons, support each with a clear explanation or example, and address how higher prices could influence consumers.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, supporting paragraphs, and a conclusion, and the reader can follow your overall agreement. Paragraphs are generally focused, and linking phrases such as “Furthermore” and “In conclusion” help signal movement between points. However, progression is limited: the second paragraph lists examples of unhealthy foods without connecting them clearly to the proposed price increase, while the next paragraph introduces addiction but does not develop its relationship to your position. Some transitions, including “Explaining some of the another supporting points,” sound mechanical and do not clarify the logic. Build each body paragraph around one claim, then explain and illustrate it before moving to the next.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic-related vocabulary, including “manufactured,” “detrimental effects,” “excessive amount,” “addictive,” and “levied.” These choices show an attempt to use more formal and less common language, and the meaning is generally understandable. Some expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, however, such as “high sugar level,” “harmful tasting salts,” “demotivate public,” and “make future purchase.” There is also repetition of broad terms such as “products,” “foods,” and “drinks,” which limits precision. Choose collocations that express the argument directly—for example, language about sugar content, consumer demand, and purchasing decisions—and check whether formal phrases sound natural in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “which ultimately creates many health issues” and a conditional-style explanation beginning “As a consequence.” The main ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors affect accuracy. For example, “which has numerous side effects” does not agree with the plural noun “salts,” and “kids and college goers … also orders” has a subject–verb agreement error. Articles and number are also inconsistent in phrases such as “high sugar level” and “excessive amount of sugar.” Punctuation is missing after “adolescents,” creating a run-on transition into the example. Review agreement, articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries, while keeping your attempts at varied structures.

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