Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes the health issues. Sugary products should be more expensive to prevent people from diseases. Istrongly agree with this sttement because we should use it wisely. When it will be expensive, people buy it in less amount.

Firstly, most of the people ill with diabeties and they does not stop to use the sugary products. These are all sugary products increase our colestrol level and cause the diffirent diseases like obesity etc;. I also do not use these sugary products. I think, sugar is a dangrous chemical which is very bad to our health.

Drink products which contain high levels of sugar, we should not use daily. But in our country, such that drinks use in every festival. One thing is that our government also should action on make to sugary products. They should remove the high quantity sugary products and only less amount of sugary products bring in market so that the people use low levels of sugar.For instance, government can make rule that who person use extra amount of sugar, he pay extra charges. This should be only for people's health because helth is most important think for any nation especially of young people.

In conclusion,I totally agree with this point. It is the best way to prevent people's health that sugary products should be in big cost so that the people could not buy easily. Sometimes, we should be use sugary products but just in low levels.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You state a clear position in the opening and conclusion, agreeing that sugary products should cost more, and you give relevant points about diabetes, obesity and government action. However, the response only partially develops the task: the claim that higher prices will reduce consumption is asserted rather than explained, and the suggestion that governments should remove high-sugar products shifts from pricing to restriction. The example about charging people who consume extra sugar is also unclear and not well connected to the proposed price increase. The response contains 239 words, so it is 11 words below the required minimum; the 13 words copied from the prompt are not counted. Develop one or two reasons with a clear explanation or specific example to address the task more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an opening position, a body paragraph and a conclusion. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “For instance” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. However, progression within the body is uneven: it moves from diabetes and cholesterol to personal habits, festival drinks, government restrictions and extra charges without clearly linking these points. Some connections are difficult to follow, particularly “One thing is that our government also should action on make to sugary products.” The conclusion repeats the main view but adds little synthesis. Organise the body around a small number of connected reasons, and use clear references and linking phrases to show how each example supports the argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “high levels of sugar,” “diabeties,” “obesity,” “government” and “health,” so the reader can identify the subject and your main concerns. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation and spelling errors make parts of the response difficult to understand. Phrases such as “prevent people from diseases,” “use in every festival” and “make rule” are not natural in this context, while “dangrous,” “colestrol” and “helth” are misspelled. Repetition of “sugary products” and “people” also limits flexibility. Build a more accurate set of topic phrases and check spelling; for example, explain that a price rise may “discourage consumption” rather than saying people will “buy it in less amount.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including a reason clause with “because” and a purpose clause with “so that.” However, control is inconsistent, and frequent errors sometimes make the intended meaning hard to follow. Examples include “When it will be expensive,” “most of the people ill,” and “they does not stop,” which show problems with tense, missing verbs and subject–verb agreement. The sentence beginning “Drink products which contain high levels of sugar” is also incomplete, and “who person use extra amount of sugar, he pay extra charges” has faulty clause structure and agreement. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check verb forms and agreement. More accurate control of these patterns would make your argument easier to read.

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