Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, people believe that many ready to eat food product contains high amount of sugar, due to this many health related problems are rising in individuals. I strongly disagree with the statement that making this item more expensive will encourage individuals to consume less sugar, because it is totally depends on peoples how they control their consumption of sugar. This essay will discuss this topic in details in following paragraphs.

One of the main reason for opposing this view, because rising prices of high contain sugar product is not a solution to motivate people to consume less sugar. for example, people who likes to drink soft drink may still buy despite of high price. As a result, only increasing the prices of this product alone will not be solution for this cause, instead people have to change their habits.

Another reason is that rising price of sugary product may affect the manufacturer they will find new ways to sell their product. For instance, manufacturer will see sudden drop in their sell due to this they may be find some other ways to sell this product such as using marketing strategies and making some kind of fake claims like energy drinks. As a result, people will ignore the ingredient and they only see the label of product and continues having those things.

In conclusion, although rising the price of sugary products may encourage the individuals to have less sugar in body, I believe that alone rising the prices of product will not enough to motivate people to consume less sugar. This is primarily because people have habit of having high contain sugar products.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction: you disagree that higher prices will reduce sugar consumption, and the conclusion restates this view. Both body paragraphs offer relevant reasons, including that habitual consumers may continue buying soft drinks and that manufacturers could respond with marketing. However, the argument is not developed equally: the first reason is briefly asserted, while the second relies on a speculative chain of events and does not explain clearly how it affects consumption. The conclusion also concedes that higher prices may reduce consumption, which slightly weakens your otherwise clear stance. To strengthen the response, explain the limits of price increases with a specific example and develop practical alternatives, such as education or clearer food labelling.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting separate reasons, and a conclusion. Sequencing is generally easy to follow, and signposts such as “One of the main reason,” “Another reason,” and “In conclusion” help identify the stages of the argument. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, with repeated use of “As a result” and “due to this.” Some links between ideas are unclear: the move from manufacturers’ falling sales to “fake claims” and consumers ignoring ingredients needs a more explicit explanation. The introduction’s promise to discuss the topic “in following paragraphs” is also formulaic. Use clearer cause-and-effect links and connect each example directly to the claim it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate your main ideas, including “high amount of sugar,” “consumption,” “manufacturer,” “marketing strategies,” and “ingredient.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “sudden drop in their sell” and “fake claims,” although these are not natural or precise in context. Repeated wording—especially “product,” “people,” “sugar,” and “rising price”—limits flexibility, while phrases such as “high contain sugar product” and “ready to eat food product” show problems with word choice and collocation. These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding the overall argument, but they make it less fluent. Build a bank of natural topic collocations and vary repeated nouns with accurate alternatives.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a reason clause with “because” and a result clause beginning “As a result.” The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction occur across the response. For example, “food product contains” and “people who likes” have subject–verb agreement problems, while “it is totally depends” uses an incorrect verb pattern. The sentence beginning “One of the main reason for opposing this view, because…” is also structurally incomplete, and several sentences join independent ideas with commas, as in “manufacturer will see sudden drop in their sell due to this…”. Practise accurate clause construction and punctuation, then proofread for agreement and verb forms.

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