Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Sugary products are detrimental for health. Consuming a huge amount of sugar can lead to several diseases such as diabeties and sugar. kids also consume a big amount of sugary products like chocolates, candies, and cakes that ends up with the result of teeth infection in kids. If we talk about drinks, there are a several options in the market in which soft drinks, juices and energy drinks are often included that contains high level of sugar that can cause alot of problems in individuals mostly in young ages and old citizens.

people should avoid sugary products, there should be proper awareness according to this topic. But in case,people are not interested to leave that kind of products then the prices should be made more expesive to encourage people to endure less sugar.

As I am a gymrat so I usually consume less sugar or sometime no sugar. If I consume huge level of sugar intake, it leads to weight gain. If my weight rises then I suffer breathing issue. I breath heavily and feel very low and sleepy. So sugar must take but the quantity should be measured and less. It will not spike the sugar level or cause any disease or something.

Overall, sugar intake is bad for human health especially for children and older people that are above 40-60. These type of high level sugar products should be banned or costly so that the individuals will use home made products like fresh homemade juices with less sugar and homemede cakes and other dairy products.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address the central issue and make your position clear: you support making sugary products more expensive, and you also mention awareness and healthier homemade alternatives. The examples about children’s teeth and your own experience of weight gain give the response relevant support. However, the argument is only partly developed. The personal example explains a possible effect of sugar, but not clearly how higher prices would reduce consumption or improve health. The suggestion that products should be “banned or costly” also shifts between two different policies without explaining which you support. Develop the price argument with a specific explanation, such as how a tax might influence purchasing, and keep your position consistent throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure: it introduces health concerns, discusses awareness and prices, gives a personal example, and ends with a summary. This makes the main topic identifiable. However, progression between ideas is sometimes unclear, and several points are placed together without showing their relationship. For example, the paragraph beginning “As I am a gymrat” moves from personal sugar intake to weight gain and breathing problems, then to a general recommendation about quantity. The conclusion repeats earlier claims rather than drawing the argument together. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example directly to the claim it supports. More precise referencing and transitions would also help the reader follow the line of reasoning.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “health problems,” “soft drinks,” “weight gain,” and “sugar level,” so the basic message is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or informal, which sometimes makes meaning less clear. For instance, “diabeties and sugar” does not name two clear health conditions, while “teeth infection” and “endure less sugar” are not natural expressions in this context. Spelling errors such as “expesive” and “homemede” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise set of health and policy terms, and check spelling and collocations when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with clauses, such as the sentence describing drinks that “contains high level of sugar.” However, the longer structures are often difficult to control, and frequent errors affect clarity. Examples include “kids … that ends up,” where the verb does not agree with its subject, and “there are a several options,” which has an incorrect article pattern. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent, as in “But in case,people,” and several sentences begin with lowercase letters. Practise building accurate sentences with one main idea at a time, then add subordinate clauses only when you can maintain correct agreement, articles, and punctuation.

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