Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

So the topic is food and drinks available now a days have excessive ammount of sugar which can be a healthh hazard. so the topic says sugary products should be sell at more price so that peaple will avoid taking more of it.

Different peope can have different oppinion on this, people in favour of this topic will say it true and sugar products should be more expensive, as it will affect their health, wich on some level is true having an extra ammount of sugar intake on daily basis can contribute to insulin resistance in the body which will eventually make you dibetic. Also now a days easily access to high level of sugary products can made children tempt to buy it which have negative impact on their health. Additionally increasing the cost of sugary items will not stop children infact elderly people who have dibeties from consuming it they will still their parents to buy in for and elderly will bu still buy it with their own money.

Let me give an example my grandfather had dibeties and his sugar intake and insulin spike had been monitored closely everyday but on his last days of life his insulin was uncontrolable at home every one was surprised to see it as every thing is monitor so were is the problem. one day when my brother was returning home he saw grandfather at a sweet shop near our house enjoying gulab jamun with his friend. And when he was asked that why he did that he said you only get to live once. So there was no way of stoping him.

In my opinion, i disagree with this statement, increasing the cost can be effective at some level but what i think it is not sustainable way of people consuming it. Furthermore, one solution might be to have more options available for less sugary products in market at much less price.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear in the final paragraph: you disagree that higher prices are a sustainable way to reduce sugar consumption. You also give relevant reasons, including children’s access to sugary products and your grandfather’s continued purchase of sweets despite diabetes. However, the response only partly develops the task: the example illustrates why price increases may not deter some people, but the broader claim about effectiveness is not supported with further explanation or evidence. The alternative of offering cheaper low-sugar products is relevant but is introduced briefly. To strengthen the response, explain how this alternative would change purchasing habits and address whether higher prices might still help some consumers, so the argument is more fully balanced and developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable overall structure: it introduces the issue, presents arguments about health and access, gives a personal example, and ends with your position and an alternative. This helps the reader follow the main line of thought. However, progression is uneven: the opening repeats the prompt, and the second paragraph combines several points without clear separation. Some links are mechanical or unclear, such as “Additionally” before the claim that price increases will not stop children or older people, and the shift from children to elderly people is abrupt. Use distinct paragraphs for the opposing view, your counterargument and your solution, and make each transition show the relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “insulin resistance,” “health,” “sugary products” and “sustainable,” and the personal example gives the response specific language. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes meaning less clear. For example, “sugar intake and insulin spike” is imprecise in this context, while “tempt to buy it” and “stoping him” do not express the intended ideas naturally. Spelling errors such as “ammount,” “dibeties” and “uncontrolable” are also noticeable. Build a more accurate range for discussing pricing and consumption, and check spelling and collocations during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including a conditional idea about increased prices and a relative clause describing children’s health. However, complex sentences are often difficult to follow because of errors in sentence boundaries, verb forms and agreement. For instance, “sugary products should be sell at more price” has an incorrect passive construction, and “which have negative impact” does not agree clearly with its subject. Several sentences run together, particularly the long sentence beginning “Additionally increasing the cost,” while punctuation and capitalisation are inconsistent. Practise forming accurate passive structures and checking subject–verb agreement, then divide long sentences into shorter units. This will make your argument easier to understand.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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