Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, consumption of unhealthy food and high intake of sugar has raised serious concerns on public health. In is believed that increasing the purchase price of sugary products will discourage people from buying them. I strongly agree that products containing high proportion of sugar can cause many health issues. Although, raising the prices is not the effective solution for this problem.

Consuming large amout of sugar can cause weight gain, diabetes, heart disease and liver issues. These can be mitigated through a balanced diet. Including protein, carbs and vitamin induced food in our meals helps us stay healthy and avoid any health problems.

In order to control the consumption of sugary products, there should be more awareness spread of the disadvantages it holds on our body. Helping people get the right knowledge will let them take reasonable and an informed decision. People who are concerned for their well being will reduce or limit the sugar intake. While others who are addicted to having sweet treats will face issues to control their cravings. For them, an alternative for the sugar can be formed. Desserts and treats could be cooked using an healthy substitute to sugar which can still satisfy their sweet cravings. This way, people can still enjoy the food while maintaining a healthy lifestyle.

In conclusion, high sugar intake can cause many health issues among the people and it should be controlled in order to live a sound life. Spreading awareness about the effect sugar has on human body and adapting to a suitable substitute for sugar can help control the sugar consumption amongst the people.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify relevant health consequences, including weight gain, diabetes and heart disease, and offer alternatives such as awareness campaigns and sugar substitutes. However, the response does not consistently answer the central question of whether sugary products should be made more expensive. The introduction says you “strongly agree” that sugar causes health issues, but then says raising prices is “not the effective solution”; this leaves your position on the proposed price increase unclear. Most of the essay develops other measures rather than explaining why price rises would or would not reduce consumption. To strengthen the response, state your view on pricing clearly and support it with developed reasons and a relevant example, while presenting awareness or substitutes as supporting measures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate body paragraphs and a conclusion. Ideas within the body paragraphs are generally related: the health effects are grouped together, followed by possible ways to reduce sugar consumption. However, the overall progression is weakened because the introduction appears to reject higher prices, while the conclusion focuses on awareness and substitutes without directly resolving that position. Some links are also awkward or unclear, such as “Although, raising the prices…” and “While others who are addicted…”. Use clearer transitions to show how each paragraph supports your answer to the question, and ensure the conclusion restates a consistent position. This would make the organisation more coherent and the connections between ideas easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic-related vocabulary, including “consumption,” “balanced diet,” “cravings,” “substitute” and “maintaining a healthy lifestyle.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, and the meaning is generally clear. There are, however, several inaccurate or unnatural expressions: “awareness spread of the disadvantages,” “vitamin induced food,” and “issues to control their cravings.” Some word forms and spelling also need attention, such as “amout” and “well being.” Aim for more natural collocations and precise phrasing, for example, “raise awareness of the disadvantages,” “foods rich in vitamins,” and “struggle to control their cravings.” This would make your vocabulary more fluent and accurate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex structures, including “Although, raising the prices is not the effective solution” and “Desserts and treats could be cooked using…” The main ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors occur in sentence construction, articles and agreement. For example, “In is believed” should be “It is believed,” and “an healthy substitute” should be “a healthy substitute.” The opening also joins contrasting ideas awkwardly: “I strongly agree… Although, raising the prices…”; use a complete, clearly connected sentence to express the contrast. Review article use and sentence boundaries, and check that each clause has a clear grammatical relationship. More accurate control of these patterns would improve readability.

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