Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Several manufactured eating and drinking goods contain a large amount of sugar in them leading to numerous health problems. Therefore the prices of sugary products should be increased,in effort, to motivate people to consume less sugar. I disagree with this as i think the the disadvantages outweigh the advantages.

Increasing the price of products which have sugar in them will lead to a decline in the consumption of sugar as various individuals simply needed a reason to to stop partaking it. This would also encourage more people to start working out as their biggest cravings are removed now.

However, sugar is not particularly bad for our body, if taken in moderation. Excess of any food item will lead to health problems. Research conducted in the University of Wyoming shows us that glucose, an important carbohydrate in sugar, can give a small energy boost as its main function is to turn food into energy immediately. It also increases dopamine, the "feel good" chemical in our body. Increasing the prices of sugary products would not lead to major decline in the sales of these products as people have built a certain lifestyle around it. For example, every children gather during Halloween to get chocolates and candies around the neighbouhood. A price increase would just make the parents furious and the children unhappy.

In conclusion, i disagree with the idea that an increase in prices of sugary products would lead to a dramatic decline in the consumption of these products. Although it might have minor decline, the lifestyle we've built around it is simply to large to ignore.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you disagree that higher prices would meaningfully reduce sugar consumption, and you acknowledge the opposing point that a price rise could reduce consumption. The discussion is relevant, but the response only partly develops the task. The claim that people would “start working out” when cravings are removed is not clearly explained, and the Halloween example mainly illustrates the cultural popularity of sweets rather than showing why price increases would not reduce overall consumption. The paragraph on sugar’s benefits also shifts attention from the policy question without fully connecting those benefits to your disagreement. To strengthen the response, explain how price changes affect different consumers and support each main reason with a more direct example or explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the reader can follow the broad contrast between a possible reduction in consumption and your reasons for disagreeing. However, progression within the argument is uneven. The first body paragraph moves from reduced consumption to exercise without explaining the link, while the next combines moderation, glucose, dopamine, sales and Halloween, making its central point less focused. Connectors such as “However,” “For example” and “In conclusion” help signal stages, but some links between claims are not sufficiently clear. Organise each body paragraph around one main reason, then explain and illustrate it before moving to the next point.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “consumption,” “moderation,” “energy boost,” “cravings” and “lifestyle.” These choices make the main ideas understandable, and some topic-specific language helps you discuss both health and consumer behaviour. There are, however, several awkward or imprecise expressions, such as “manufactured eating and drinking goods,” “partaking it” and “major decline in the sales.” Spelling and word-form choices also need attention, including “neighbouhood” and “every children.” Aim for more natural collocations and precise terms, especially when describing the policy and its effects. This would make the argument sound more fluent and appropriately academic without requiring unnecessarily complex vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including a conditional structure (“if taken in moderation”) and a relative clause (“which have sugar in them”). The overall meaning is generally recoverable, but some errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles and punctuation reduce accuracy. Examples include “the the disadvantages,” “every children gather,” and “a price increase would just make the parents furious and the children unhappy,” where the article and number choices need correction. The opening sentence also has a faulty comma pattern around “in effort.” Capitalisation of “I” is inconsistent. Review sentence boundaries and proofread for agreement and punctuation; more accurate control of these forms would make your varied structures clearer.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.