Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The increased marketing of high sweetened food products and beverages has raised the prevalence of major health issues. As a result, people believe that high sugary products should be as much costly, to be unable to afford by local communities, a statement i strongly agree with.

The main reason i agree with the opinion is that local markets nowadays, have multiple cheap options available with high sucrose content and extremely low nutritional value. It is due to the fact that people, usually from low income families, do prefer products that they assume are much budget friendly. As a result of that, they pick foods that appear as a burden for their own health, later in life. For instance; local food vendors sale sugar loaded and unhygienically prepared sweets in a very low cost. Local people with lack of nutritional knowledge, prioritise such unhealthy options over the costly, hygienic, and nutritionally appropriate choices.

Another reason is the lack of nutritional knowledge. People from diverse backgrounds don't understand what is beneficial or detrimental for their health. Therefore, they buy food, they find more convenient and have their cravings immediately satisfied with. Depending solely on high sugar and carbohydrates diet, consequently gives rise to a substantial number of micronutrient deficiencies, another major cause of undernutrition, overnutrition, and obesity. For example; A South American study depicted that despite of having enough physical and economic access, people consume high sugar diets, due to the fact that they are unfamiliar to the hazardous affects of sucrose ob human health.

In conclusion, it strongly believe that it is incumbent upon governments to take a control over the rising health problems by increasing the prices of high sugar products marketing, issuing fines to the local vendors on selling unhygienic and unhealthy foods, and setting additional taxes over purchasing sugar products. Additionally, acknowledging people with nutrition education can be helpful to develop healthy food choices at individual and household level.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction and conclusion: you strongly support making sugary products more expensive. You give relevant reasons, including the availability of cheap, high-sugar foods and limited nutrition knowledge, and the vendor example helps illustrate the first point. This meets the task well, but the argument is not equally developed throughout. The second reason focuses mainly on education and dietary effects, so the link between raising prices and reducing consumption needs clearer explanation. The South American study is also presented without enough detail to show how it supports your position. To strengthen the response, explain the likely effect of higher prices on purchasing and acknowledge a possible limitation, such as the impact on low-income consumers.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs with separate reasons, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “As a result,” “Another reason,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the argument. However, some connections feel mechanical or unclear. For example, the second body paragraph moves from limited knowledge to cravings and then to nutrient deficiencies without fully explaining each link. The conclusion also introduces several policy measures, including fines and nutrition education, which are not all developed in the body. Use referencing and transitions to show how each point supports the central claim, and keep the conclusion focused on the argument already established.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a reasonably broad range of topic vocabulary, including “nutritional value,” “micronutrient deficiencies,” “overnutrition,” and “economic access.” These choices show an effort to discuss health and food policy precisely. Some less common expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, however, and this sometimes makes the meaning less clear: “high sweetened food products,” “as much costly,” and “unfamiliar to the hazardous affects” are examples. There are also spelling and word-form slips, such as “sale” where “sell” is intended and “affects” for “effects.” Aim for natural collocations and check word forms carefully; accurate, straightforward phrasing will be more effective than ambitious wording that does not fit the context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “As a result,” “Therefore,” and “despite.” Most of the argument remains understandable, but some grammatical errors recur and occasionally make sentences difficult to follow. For example, “people, usually from low income families, do prefer” has awkward word order and unnecessary emphasis, while “it strongly believe” lacks the correct subject–verb form. The sentence beginning “Depending solely on high sugar and carbohydrates diet” is also not grammatically complete in its construction. Review articles, agreement, sentence boundaries, and punctuation, and read each sentence aloud to check that its subject and main verb are clear.

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