Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

IT IS OFTEN SUGESTED THAT THE PRODUCTS CONTAINING HIGH LEVEL OF SUGAR SHOULD BE MADE EXPENSIVE SO THAT SUGAR INTAKE OF INDIVIDUALS SHOULD BE REDUCED. I STRONGLY AGREE TO THIS PERSPECTIVE BECAUSE SUGAR CAUSE MANY HEALTH PROBLEMS.

THE SIGNIFICANT FACTOR CONTRIBUTING TO THIS IS THAT EXPENSIVE ITEMS ARE USUALLY DIFFICULT T BUY. IF THESE PRODUCTS ARE MADE EXPENSIVE PEOPLE WILL AVOID THIS AND SHIFT TO HEALTHY ALTERNATIVES. THIS WILL LEAD TO HEALTHY LIFESTYLE. FOR INSTANT IF SOFT DRINKS ARE MADE HIGHLY EXPENSIVE THAN THE INDIVIDUALS WILL AVOID TO BUY IT AND INSTEAD OF THESE DRINKS THEY WILL LIKE TO CHOOSE CHEAP FRUIT JUICES AND HEALTHY DRINKS.

ANOTHER MAIN REASON TO AVOID SUGARY ITEMS IS THE SERIOUS HEALTH ISSUES CAUSED BY SUGAR INTAKE. MEDICAL EXPERTS SAY THAT SUGAR IS THE SWEET POISON. IT IS THE ROOT CAUSE OF MANY DISEASES. DIABETES IS ONE THE MAJOR DISEASES CAUSED BY HIGH LEVEL OF SUGAR IN BLOOD. MOREOVER, IT ALSO CAUSES HEART PROBLEMS. ADDITIONALLY, TOOTH DECAY IS ALSO THE MAJOR PROBLEM ESPECIALLY IN CHILDREN CAUSED BY SUGAR INTAKE.

FROM MY PERSPECTIVE, I FIRMLY BELIEVE THAT PRICES OF THESE PROCESSSED FOOD AND DRINKS SHOULD BE RAISED SO THAT LARGE NUMBER OF INDIVIDUALS WILL SHIFT TO HEALTHY IFE STYLE BEACUSE HEALTH IS WEALTH. IN CONCLUSION I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THAT THE GOVERNMENT SHOULD IMPOSE A TAX ON ALL THESE UNHEALTHY FOOD ITEMS AND MAKE THEM HIGHLY EXPENSIVE SO THAT PEOPLE THINK TWICE BEFORE BUYING THEM. THIS WILL PROMOTE HEALTHY AND SEDENTARY LIFESTYLE.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you strongly agree that sugary products should cost more, and the conclusion proposes government taxation. You also give relevant reasons, including choosing alternatives and health risks such as diabetes, heart problems and tooth decay. However, the argument is only partly developed: the claim that people would switch to fruit juice is asserted rather than supported, and the health paragraph lists conditions without explaining how higher prices would reduce sugar consumption or improve health. The response is also three words below the required minimum. To strengthen the response, explain the likely effect of a price increase and support your examples with more specific reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, two reason paragraphs and a conclusion. The progression from price influencing choices to health consequences is easy to follow, and signposts such as “Another main reason,” “Moreover” and “In conclusion” help identify the stages of the argument. Some cohesion is mechanical, however, because several sentences begin with linking expressions, and references such as “this” and “these products” are not always precise. The final paragraph also repeats the position and tax proposal rather than adding a distinct concluding insight. Use a wider range of links between ideas and make references explicit—for example, name the products or effects instead of relying on “this.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main argument, including “sugar intake,” “health problems,” “diabetes,” “tooth decay” and “impose a tax.” There are also attempts at more expressive language, such as “sweet poison” and “health is wealth,” although these sound like slogans and do not add much precision to an academic argument. Noticeable spelling and word-choice problems include “sugested,” “expensive” where “more expensive” is needed, “for instant,” “processed” misspelled, and “sedentary lifestyle,” which does not mean a healthy, active lifestyle. These errors make the writing less natural, though the central meaning remains understandable. Prioritise accurate collocations and proofread spelling before using more elaborate expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple statements and longer conditional or subordinate structures, as in “If these products are made expensive people will avoid this” and “so that people think twice before buying them.” This gives the response some structural variety, but control is uneven. Errors include subject–verb agreement in “Sugar cause,” a missing article in “Diabetes is one the major diseases,” and faulty patterns such as “avoid to buy it” and “made highly expensive than.” Some sentences also omit necessary punctuation after introductory clauses. These problems sometimes make relationships between ideas less clear. Practise accurate conditional sentences and verb patterns, and check articles, agreement and sentence punctuation during revision.

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