Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In present time the consumption of manufactured food and drinks become increasingly popular among the young people. The excessive use of high level of sugar affect the human health and cause disease. I argued that government should impose high tax on sugary products to reduce the consumption of sugar in a people. I strongly agree with this statement to reduce the consumption of sugary substance among the consumer.

On the one hand, the usage of processed food increased drastically in a short duration among the people. Due to excessive intake of high sugar products cause severe disease among the consumer such as diabetes and obesity. For instance, in a recent survey the number of diabetics patient increased rapidly in short time. According to survey 31% adults are suffer from diabetes. In addition, governement should impose high tax on the industrially produce food to reduce the consumption which generate the great amount of tax revnue for the country. Therefore, companies will change the recipes of there food to reduce the tax on the food.

On the other hand, due to high price of processed food it is unfair for the poor people because tey are not able to buy this food. However, the rich peope easily afford these sugary food and drinks. Sugar is addictive. People continues to buy this even if this price is higher, so that why educate the peoples about the detrimental affect of sugar on the the human health.

In conclusion, I agree that sugary products should be made more expensive because it will improve public health and force companies to produce healthier products.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction and conclusion: you agree that sugary products should cost more, and you give relevant reasons, including health risks and the possibility that companies may reformulate products. This addresses the task and shows some development. However, the argument is uneven: the claim that a tax will lead companies to change recipes is asserted rather than explained, and the survey statistic is not clearly connected to the case for higher prices. You also introduce the concern that poorer people may be disadvantaged, but do not explain how this affects your overall position or how it could be addressed. Developing these points with clearer reasoning and specific support would make the response more complete and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting contrasting considerations, and a conclusion that restates your view. Linking phrases such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the broad progression. However, some connections between ideas are unclear or mechanical. For example, the move from the health effects of sugar to tax revenue does not explain how the second point supports your argument, and “However” introduces a contrast without fully resolving the concern about affordability. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, as in “buy this” and “this price.” Organise each paragraph around one main purpose and use clearer links between claims and explanations.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “processed food,” “high tax,” “diabetes,” “obesity,” “addictive,” and “detrimental effect,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “industrially produce food.” However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, word-form, and spelling errors reduce precision: “consumption of sugar in a people,” “diabetics patient,” and “generate the great amount of tax revnue” are awkward or inaccurate. Repetition of “people,” “food,” and “sugar” also limits flexibility. Aim to learn common collocations and check spelling and word forms; for example, use “sugar consumption,” “patients with diabetes,” and “tax revenue.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a reason clause beginning “because” and a result clause with “so that.” The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but grammatical control is inconsistent, and errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Examples include “the consumption … become” and “high level of sugar affect,” where subject–verb agreement is missing, and “Due to excessive intake … cause,” which lacks a clear grammatical subject. There are also problems with articles, plurals, and sentence construction, as in “31% adults are suffer.” Practise building accurate complete clauses first, then combine them using subordinate clauses. Check agreement, verb forms, and articles when proofreading.

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