Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-11-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and that other measures are needed.
Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Over the past few years, smoking has become increasingly popular among people. It is a favourite topic of discussion that whether smoking should be completely banned in public places or there are more steps which should be implemented. I intend to discuss both the views with relevant examples in the following paragraphs.
To commence with, some critics believe that the best possible way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public property. To elaborate it, if government strictly impose penalty for the smokers who break the rule then there are chances of positive development. For illustration, in Japan, there are complete smoking restrictions in certain government and public areas. As a result, there are few cases of lung cancer and respiratory distress syndrome in the particular area.
Furthermore, others believe that restriction alone is not capable of reducing smoking rates. Therefore, other measures should also be taken. The government should provide health care awareness program for smokers. Additionally, prices of cigarettes and tobacco should be high so that people can think twice before purchasing such products. The authority should encourage celebrity to make advertisement about stop smoking habit and encourage smokers to use Nicotex gum as an alternative. For instance, there are many smoking rehabilitation centres in India and there are high rates of discontinuation in smoking habits after attending sessions in the centres.
To conclude, although banning cigarettes and tobacco at public places is a must. I personally believe that combine strategies will work more effectively. Health care awareness program, high prices on smoking products and rehabilitation center are very essential to reduce smoking rates. As an outcome, there are chances of developing smoking free healthy nations.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
You address both views and give a clear opinion that combined measures are more effective. The response stays relevant, and the examples of public smoking restrictions in Japan and rehabilitation centres in India help illustrate your points. This meets the task well, though some ideas are more fully explained than others: the case for public-place bans is supported mainly by a brief claim about penalties and health outcomes, while the proposed awareness campaigns, higher prices and cessation support receive more detail. The link between restrictions and fewer cases of illness is also asserted rather than explained. To strengthen the response further, develop each main reason with a clearer explanation of how it discourages smoking, and make the examples more precise and directly connected to the argument.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion that restates your position. Sequencing expressions such as “To commence with,” “Furthermore,” and “To conclude” make the progression easy to follow, and the reader can distinguish the two sides of the discussion. However, some linking is mechanical, and the conclusion begins with a sentence fragment-like construction: “although banning cigarettes and tobacco at public places is a must.” The relationship between the Japan example and the claim about health outcomes could also be made clearer. For stronger progression, use transitions that express the precise relationship between ideas, and connect each example explicitly to the point it supports.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “penalty,” “restrictions,” “rehabilitation centres,” and “discontinuation,” so the main ideas are communicated clearly. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “positive development” and “combined strategies.” However, several word choices and collocations are unnatural or imprecise, including “smoking has become increasingly popular,” “public property,” and “encourage celebrity to make advertisement.” Repetition of “smoking” and “government” also limits flexibility. These issues do not prevent understanding, but they reduce precision and naturalness. Aim to learn common topic collocations and check whether a phrase expresses your intended meaning, rather than choosing a formal-sounding expression that is not idiomatic.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional and subordinate clauses, as in “if government strictly impose penalty…” and “although banning cigarettes and tobacco…”. The overall meaning is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “whether smoking should be… or there are more steps” has an unbalanced structure, and “if government strictly impose penalty” has problems with articles and subject–verb agreement. The conclusion’s opening “although” clause is not completed as a full sentence. To improve control, check agreement and articles, make paired alternatives grammatically parallel, and ensure every subordinate clause is attached to a complete main clause. More accurate complex sentences would make your argument easier to read.
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